Before the Looking Glass

[Buio]

Jason stepped in as she was talking and stayed silent. He hadn't quite gotten out of the analytic mindset talking with Shine had put him in so as soon as he walked in looking at rue was just a barrage of information, none of it good. He didn't listen to what she was saying very much as he instead focused on how she said it and picked up on the repressed guilt and forced calm. Her body language spoke even louder than her words though. She was ashamed of something. She had done something she was afraid he would find out about, she was forcing herself to seem okay for him, but she couldn't ever bring herself to meet his eyes.

He hadn't really listened to what she said so when she stopped talking he just walked towards her silently, and crouched beside her before pulling her into a tight embrace, cupping the back of her head softly. "Rue, I love you, we're family now, no matter what. You don't have to hide what you did in here. I already know, I understand."

He gave her another small squeeze and ten slowly distanced himself from her, smiling comfortingly. "To be honest, I'm kind of surprised you'd try to hide it at all. I don't know how you thought we wouldn't hear your vomiting in the kitchen, and even if we didn't the smell is still pretty apparent once you step in here." He chuckled lightly then smiled again. "But you know, it's alright, you don't have to be ashamed or anything. It's natural to be afraid. Even I'm afraid, I was just told how to handle that better than most people. We'll make it through together though, and if you can't trust shine, then trust me. I can guarantee you she won't ever hurt you; she'd never hurt anyone important to me."


His smile then became somewhat more sly and was accompanied by a light redness to his cheeks. "And besides, even if you did throw up, doesn't change that i still totally want to kiss you right now, just as much as last night."

 

[Ravenbelle]

He didn't seem to respond to what she said when he entered, probably gaining information and growing more and more disgusted with her. She bit her lip and only lessened the pressure when he wrapped his arms around her and held her close. She could hear his words clearly in one ear and the other heard his tone deep in his chest as she stared forward wondering if Jason was Jason.

"Rue, I love you, we're family now, no matter what. You don't have to hide what you did in here. I already know, I understand."

Rue blinked and her dark blue eyes widened at the words. She could hear them, but were they real? He knew? He...knew? No..it couldn't be. Her arms loosened around her slightly and she leaned into him, shocked in utter disbelief. He loved her...even knowing about what she'd almost done. He didn't seem revolted at all. It was as if he didn't even acknowledge her arm. So he wouldn't hurt her feelings? Was he being honest? She watched him closely, eyes misty as he squeezed her and moved away to smile at her. He seemed entirely unperturbed about her episode and she couldn't quite figure it out until he specified and mentioned how she'd been ill.

Rue's face fell and she kind of stopped listening. She tightened her arms around herself , and grit her teeth holding back. That's all she ever seemed to do these days. Hold back. Oh how it hurt to have his words stab her heart. Because he didn't know? Wasn't it better this way? So she doesn't have to fool herself into thinking he could actually love her or even care about her if he knew? At the least, he'd stop believing she was strong. She isn't. She's scared and delusional and weak. If any of the Broken Mirrors deserved to be with Jason now, it wasn't her. She's a wreck, an idiot. She should tell him, warn him before he ends up finding out on his own and being more disappointed in her than ever. Rue winced, forced herself into paying attention again.

"..and if you can't trust Shine, then trust me. I can guarantee you she won't ever hurt you; she'd never hurt anyone important to me."

Rue nodded slightly, breathed and pressed down all of her emotions into a little bottle . It cracked, but she could deal with that later. Now is not the time. Rue looked up at him and sighed. If only he knew. He'd want anything but to kiss her.

She just cleared her tight throat , clenched her fists and looked down. " ..I trust you Jason. Um. I'll meet up with you two in a second. I'm just going to brush my teeth and stuff." She gave him a wan smile and let a couple tears slip whenever he left her.

Once she stood, Rue had to hang onto the wall to keep from falling over. She felt completely empty and sort of miserable. Wobbling her way over to the sink, she brushed her teeth thoroughly and drank the tap water once finished. It only made her feel marginally better. It would have to do. She checked her arm. Still red, a little bit of dried blood. She'd have to wear a jacket. Before she left, she couldn't avoid glancing at the mirror. She absolutely hated the girl she saw. Abhorred her. She got the urge to hit the mirror as hard as she could, but she didn't even deserve that. It'd be too symbolic. She's not a Broken Mirror anymore. She never should have been. She only ever wanted to help the others. But now there are no others to help. And if there are, she can't do anything about it. Can't do anything about anything.
The bottle cracked. She took deep breaths and dashed out of the bathroom so she could exchange her pajama shorts for zipped up black jacket and jeans.

So she stepped out of her door, pursed her lips and returned to Jason's side. She didn't exactly belong there, buy she wasn't sure what to convey or not to convey to Shine. Eyes down and arms crossed, Rue shuffled slightly and whispered. "I'm sorry.Really." She glanced up at Shine for a moment. "Um...where were we?"

 

[Buio]

Shine looked up at rue and gave her a small, professional smile when she entered the room. "I was about to ask you how the both of you are doing. Adjusting to life outside of institutions like Brew has proven to be difficult for several people in the past. Its not everything that can be conveyed properly through messages or even holo-calls, so I wanted to 'touch base' as it were. Though, before that, I would like to reconfirm that I have your consent in leaving the mental barriers i put in your mind in place?"

 

[Ravenbelle]

Rue had no idea what to take as a good or bad sign from Shine. There were endless possibilities to the intentions behind her eye. Behind that small smile. The woman was still distant and frightening to Rue. And she wasn't sure of how close to get. She trusts Jason. But that's all she really knows for sure here. It was enough to try. To listen without narrowing her eyes and gritting her teeth.
Rue had no reason to tell Shine how she was doing. She could figure it out for herself couldn't she? She didn't want to tell her. At all. She tightened her arms around herself, sighed and considered how much easier it was to think just slightly clearer without the barrage of visions...how Jason would feel. Her eyes glanced to him for a moment, then back to Shine. "Mhm."

 

[Buio]

Shine nodded "Good, as an added benefit they'll make your mind harder to detect and read for other psychics. Nothing that would stop an S-level of course, putting those kids of defences around your mind would pain a bull's eye on you, but lower ranked telepaths shouldn't be much of an issue for you. Now, how about you tell me how your nightmares have been? I know they were a persisting issue in your time at brew. Have they subsided at all?"

 

[Ravenbelle]

Shine nodded approvingly and explained the benefits as if that would change the fact that she'd manipulated her mind without Rue's permission. The redhead just blinked at her, having lost much of her resolve to doubt the woman thanks to Jason. She was more withdrawn now, reminding herself of that time when she did as she was told whenever someone told her. For a moment, she wondered what kind of "lower-ranked telepaths" she'd run into, but that just made the walls in her head stretch. The future wanted to be seen, needed it and Rue was, for whatever reason, the one chosen to watch. She shouldn't want to watch it, but she does. Rue misses the knowledge, the safety that came with learning of what's up ahead. But that doesn't matter. Nothing about her matters while Jason's unsafe.
Including her stupid nightmares. Rue pursed her lips shut against the questions and averted her eyes. That was probably enough answer for the lady. Rue didn't want to think about her nightmares, about how they're more about the past than the future these days, so her stomach decided to mess with her dark train of thought by knotting up on her painfully. Rue took a few deep breaths and leaned on the wall beside her holding herself together, pale and still closer to the kitchen than to Shine.
When she could speak without feeling like she'd need to sit, Rue simply inquired "Why do you ask?"
That's all she wanted to know really when it came to most questions Shine asked her. Why would she ask about Rue when it's clear that the girl's only purpose now is to protect Jason, who would be more willing to answer the questions anyway?

 

[Buio]

Jason watched with evident concern as rue seemed to become nauseous and light headed, standing ready to catch her if she fainted, but shine remained stoic, remaining unaffected by rue's following comment.

She gave a small, short sigh and looked back at Rue. "You see me as the cold blooded master strategist, and in many ways it's good that you do, but I'll inform you of one thing you seem to have failed to realize miss Benette: It is highly unwise to mistake a pragmatic and stoic disposition for a passionless and emotionless personality. Nearly every single Broken Mirror That was recruited by Jason into your group, including yourself, was hand picked and directed to his attention by me, there were only three he encountered on his own means and still found to be trustworthy and reliable. That means, Rue, that I knew the face and name and favourite snack bar of each and every one of your comrades and, unlike you, i know exactly which ones died during that mission and which were dragged back into their prison by the administrators. Everything I do is wit their fates in mind, with the goal of returning to brew and liberating those still alive before the administrators dispose of them all, but attaining that reality by making decisions based on emotion and empty morality is, quite simply, impossible." the speech ha been passionless and unaccusatory, she paused to sip of her tea some more, and then continued. "The reason I explain all of this to you is because this is the mentality an effective leader must adopt when facing intelligent and ruthless enemies like the administrators and the people they work with. Jason intends to one day become such a leader, he won't be able to give up the fight against Brewster's if even one of his comrades is still imprisoned by them, you know this about him as much as I do."

Jason tense lightly at being spoken of like this all of a sudden, but at the same time he couldn't really argue against what shine was saying. He'd never really thought about it, but it was true that he'd never intended on leaving anyone behind for good, and in his mind he had never really stopped thinking of himself like the leader of the broken mirrors. It had just become apart of his identity at that point, and would continue to be as long as he had at least one member loyal to him. considering this, it would just make sense to conclude he would be involved in this secret war that seemed to be going on for many years to come. Somehow that thought didn't scare him as much as it should. If anything, he felt relieved. It would have been far worse being told that he had to forget about everything and live a normal life. He didn't know how to be normal. He knew how to fight back against the oppression of the administrators though. Other people could go and have normal lives. It suited him much more to continue fighting from the shadows until everyone else was free.

"If you intend to support him," continued Shine, "then you will need to come to understand this point of view if you want to be able to be of any help to him."

 

[Ravenbelle]

Rue did not look up even when she sensed Jason come closer in response to her physical weakness. Even after her first peaceful sleep cycle last night, she was exhausted. Maybe it was because of her anxiety and loss of breakfast, but she didn't care either way. She just kept standing against the wall (which looked way easier than it felt) and only looked up when Shine replied with a short, seemingly frustrated sigh. Of course when Rue met the woman's one green eye, she couldn't see any clear intention or emotion but mystery. Fear of the unknown can be a powerful thing. Or maybe it only seems that way because right now, Rue sees herself as a house of cards fragile enough to be blown down at any time.

She knew Shine was right, though it had little to do with the question she had posed about her nightmares. She could have realized the fact that Shine was not to be mistaken for a heartless automaton on her own. She's read many stories and lived through them well enough to know that sometimes, the most tortured soul has the best mask to hide it. Unfortunately, the redhead had no time to think it through quickly enough. She felt utterly tiny again, ignorant and idiotic while Shine was always ten steps ahead, if not more. Though her tone was unaccusatory, Rue still winced, especially when she was told that Shine, who had felt like a mere guiding force among he Broken Mirrors at the time, knew more about her friends and their fates than she herself did. Her heart is completely covered by the hilts of knives slicing all the way through. How the beating thing in her chest still functions is beyond her. It was difficult to think above the fog of tempting sleep and around the bottle of the most destructive negative emotions. Why was it that Shine chose her at all? The only reason she could think up was the fact that she can see snippets of the future, but she was never intended to have been the only one left with Jason, right? She can't get anything done correctly and she's nothing but a weakling otherwise. Why was she chosen, of all espers that would have been more worthy to stand in her place?

Rue gulped as Shine sipped her tea and proceeded with her explanation, but continued to listen. She needed to hear this, however painful it was to process. Shine seemed like the type to abide by the age old phrase to keep her friends close and her enemies closer. She had to be this way in order to be successful, but only when she mentioned Jason was Rue able to imagine the tremendous load upon Shine's shoulders. There always needed to be a leader, but Rue did not want to see Jason take that position. The burden was certainly heavy upon the woman, however well she managed its weight. Even if Jason's leadership could prove flawless and beneficial for the greater good, Rue was afraid of how it would inevitably change him. She couldn't see what he would become. There was a foolish hope in her that Jason would always be...sort of with her. On her level. At Brew, he was the leader of course, but they were a bunch of kids and he didn't assume the high and mighty role of fearless leader. Back then, he seemed so shy and uninterested in the sort of respect and attitude his station would normally come with. In his current situation, he is with her all the time and Rue doesn't feel any disparity in rank or status unless Shine Is around. But if he was to be Shine's successor, in what ways would he be lost to her? How would he turn out?
He would not give up on his comrades. Everyone who knew Jason knew this. Rue's eyes slid down to the floor. She knew this to be true, but the stupid part of her (which she believes is most of her) was slightly dismayed to hear that Shine knew this too. Rue was once again reminded of the bond the two share--they're even physically similar-- that seemed so strong even when built across long distances. Rue was the third, unnecessary wheel to the vehicle that would bring change and whatever freedom possible to those who cannot free themselves. Around the white haired pair, Rue felt that she was not needed. Which hurts. It's not as if she had anything else she could do. Living an idle life in whatever the hell freedom is supposed to be doesn't sound appealing to her at all. She would be in the same state she's in now. A rut that kept her pacing and dying to do something, anything that could help others. That's all she ever wanted to do.

So yes. She would always support Jason. She understood Shine's point of view. And she was tired. Tired of going against something that Jason wholly believed in however loosely that term can be used when Shine's around...
So Rue nodded, eyes half closed and resigned. Why does this feel like giving up?
"I understand." Finally, dimwit. She cleared her throat which felt tight and resistant to the average volume most would speak with. "...T-Thank you, for explaining. You, um..you want to know about my nightmares? They--have not subsided, but for now, they don't...well, they aren't...it's.." She sighed, let her head drop and cut to the point of it. Shine only wants to know about them in relation to her powers right? "I haven't dreamt of the future since I arrived here." She couldn't help but look away from them. It's a touchy subject for her. Recently, her list of touchy subjects has seemed to grow longer. Wow. She is so sensitive. Why can't she stop being so aggrivatingly emotional?

 

[Buio]

Shine nodded silently and listened as Rue calmed down and explained the state of her sleeping subconscious, taking another sip of tea during. Once rue was done she wasted no time with her reply.

"If you don't mind sharing, what are the contents of these dreams? How do they trouble you?" her expression, remained calmly inquisitive. Evidently learning of the lack of futresight hadn't answered all of her questions concerning the girl's psyche.

 

[Ravenbelle]

Shine didn't miss a beat in asking for more when it was clear Rue didn't want to go there. Wasn't Shine supposedly extremely observant? Can't she see that her nightmares are better left in the dark? Sure Shine had started with 'if you don't mind' but Rue's learned by now that she doesn't really mean that. That's not where she'd find an escape from this line of questioning. Rue sighed again, eyes still averted to the ground. Why does Shine even want to know? It seemed like a waste of time to Rue, unless Shine for some reason wanted the pair to be less sleep deprived. The dark circles under her eyes were evident enough that the nights have been rough. But that applies to both of them. Why is Shine leaving Jason out of this discussion? Unless she wanted another excuse to mess with her head and not his...What now? She'd offer to erase her memories and then do it anyway? Rue shivered and hesitantly met that enigmatic green eye again. You'd think she'd already know what the nightmares are about considering it hasn't been much more than a week since the disastrous escape from Brewster. Why does Rue have to say it out loud? Does Shine expect something different from her? The woman had spoken about how she knew that Rue had nightmares while in Brew. Is it the content of those that she wanted to know about..whether those had persisted? They had, but Rue didn't want to say that. Not to Shine and especially not to Jason who was still standing quietly beside her as she leaned heavily on the wall. Rue could feel the beginnings of a bad headache, no doubt caused by the excessive gritting of her teeth and the worried expression that seemed constant, even on different levels. Not to mention upchucking the breakfast Jason had been so kind to make for her.

She glanced at him with helpless blue eyes. Won't she quit it already? They seemed to say, but it was no use. He believed in Shine. Maybe more than he believes in Rue. She bit her lip and tried to look at Shine again to respond, but she was too ashamed of her weakness in regard to her nightmares that she kept looking down. She was going to have to omit the bits Jason doesn't know about, not that she would have told Shine either way. Wincing at the growing intensity of her headache and interlocking her fingers together so she wouldn't scratch at her arm (which still stings) she mumbled, "Just...things I--couldn't prevent or...things I didn't..see in time. Well, the chaos while leaving Brew replays all the time." Rue gulped and slowly lowered herself to the floor, partly under the pressure she felt concerning nearly every aspect of her life, but mostly because the apartment tilted and her head isn't having it today. Rue kept her chin down and one of her hands stopped gripping her side so tightly only to do the same to the side of her head closest to the wall. Her whole face was red in humiliation and she just wanted to melt into the floor or even ask why the heck Shine wanted to know, but her questions usually don't end up helping anyone so she kept silent, wishing--not for the first time--that her power was to turn invisible.

 

[Buio]

There was something that twinged inside Jason when Rue looked at him like that. He was suddenly caught in between two polarizing emotions, his knowledge of why shine was asking those questions and wanting to see their resolution, and a sudden new feeling that perhaps rue wasn't quite ready to hear this line of questioning and wanting to protect her from that pain. As such he made a motion to move towards her, but hesitated, glancing back at Shine for some sort of confirmation though the woman was still calmly looking at rue. When Jason looked back at the redhead, the sapphire eyes had once more disappeared under the red bangs and Jason knew he'd missed the opportunity to step in. It was with no shortage of guilt that he listened to rue resign herself and answer Shine.

On her part the older woman observed the difficulty with which the young girl answered her, sighing softly at the clear discomfort it was causing before raising up a hand to stop her from going further, though it seemed the girl was already about done anyways. "It's alright, you don't have to say anymore. You don't have to speak if it's too sensitive a subject for you, I simply wanted to know if there was any way in which I could help you. What of your living arrangements? Is there anything you find unreasonably restrictive concerning your Accommodations? Keeping in mind, of course, our current state of affair. If there is I would gladly have it taken care of." The whole discourse had been, true to her nature, all very professional, and perhaps missing some of the caring some may have expected in her tone concerning what she was saying. But similarly nothing in shine's disposition suggested she was either displeased or lying.

 

[Ravenbelle]

Rue heard Shine's soft sigh and calm cease of questions, but didn't yet look up. She kept her ugly face hidden away so the green eyed pair couldn't analyze it anymore. At least in Jason's case, since he doesn't have invasive powers of the mind.

"You don't have to speak if it's too sensitive a subject for you,
What isn't a sensitive subject for me? I'm a wreck.
But if I go insane now, I'll be of no use to Jason...
I'm no use to him anyway. If I couldn't save any of the other Broken Mirrors even when I could See, so how could I help Jason without it?
Get it together, freak! Shine's not done yet.
Dammit.


...I simply wanted to know if there was any way in which I could help you."

Well obviously you can't. No one can. At least not without messing with my subconscious...

Rue sighed, well..more like hissed since this headache seems to have no intention of fading. So is it that Shine realized the fact that her questions were useless or did they somehow serve some mysterious purpose of hers? Either way, she didn't launch into a speech about her nightmares or help with them in any way. So...there was no point? She simply switches subjects like nothing happened...Okay, looks like Rue's realized there will not come a day when she understands Shine enough to regard her as a helpful source of psychological assistance. Whatever. Moving on...

"What of your living arrangements? Is there anything you find unreasonably restrictive concerning your Accommodations? Keeping in mind, of course, our current state of affair. If there is I would gladly have it taken care of."

At that point, dark blue eyes blinked away any previous mist, considered the question before rashly refusing help, and slowly met green eyes back and forth. Rue cleared her throat and let her gaze stop on Shine. Even though it was pointless, she tried to keep her emotions on lockdown. Taking a breath, Rue cleared her throat and pursed her lips. Nothing immediately came to mind until she looked a little more closely. More specifically, to the couch Shine was sitting on. Of course she would only think of something to benefit her roommate. She doesn't matter. "Um.." She hates asking for things. her voice takes on a childlike quality for some odd reason and she always feels embarrassed about it, like every favor is something grandiose and she doesn't deserve anything she ever asks for, not that she's often received anything she used to ask for anyway. But this is for Jason. Not her.
"If possible..I think another bed should be added. Jason hasn't let me even alternate with him on the couch so...he-he should sleep on something more comfortable. That's all. Other than that..." Rue shrugged and let her eyes return to watching the ground, as if its tilting would give her any relief from the pain or the shame or the anxiety or anything. If anyone deserved a comfortable bed, it was Jason. Way more than her.

 

[Buio]

Shine blinked, looking mildly surprised, which is still more emotive that she had yet been all day. "Hmm? Wait, you mean you don't know?".

Jason blinked as well now, looking very obviously confused. "Don't know what?"

At that point there was an audible clap throughout the living room as chess' palm met his forehead with force (as with all of his appearances he had appeared in a corner of the room while no one was looking). "Oh my god this kid is just never gonna stop, is he?" he then glared at Jason with a frustrated expression. "It's a god-damned sofa-bed you moron ever heard of one?"

Jason blinked. "uh what's a 'sophabed'? Wait, do you mean like how I've been sleeping on the sofa like it's a bed? Is that a bad thing?"

this time chess had his face in both hands and all that game out was an exasperated howl. Even Shine couldn't help but chuckle lightly. "Now now Chess, remember the status of his memories. Jason has very little understanding of the outside world besides what he learned in his time at brew, gaps in his knowledge like this are to be expected."

Chess gave a short, angry sigh and waved his hand in shine's direction, suddenly making her teleport a few feet to the side of the couch, somehow preventing her from falling and letting her retain her seated position despite nothing being below her. The woman barely seemed to react. With another wave of his hands chess made the seat cushions on the sofa disappear and he grabbed the handle that was protruding from the frame, yanking it out and unfolding a queen-sized bed in the living room. He turned back to Jason and spread his arms in a quick motion. "Tah-dahh! Your mind blown yet?"

Though Jason would never verbally admit it, it actually was. "Dude! They hid a bed, inside a sofa!? That's awesome!"

Chess twitched.

"They have LITERALLY had this technology for like a hundred years! HOW have you never heard of this before!?"

Jason shrugged "ah-uh-unh (i dunno). I guess the administrators weren't fond of the concept? I suppose it's the kind of innovation they wouldn't really have a need for in the first place, plus it doesn't mes well with their supper-orderly mentality. every tool had a purpose and was defined by its purpose in brew. Mixing and matching things together wasn't encouraged unless it was somehow related to your training."

Chess twitched again. "Really, what pisses me off more? The fact that i know I'm gonna have to go though a lot more of these 'idiot genius' moments with you, or the fact that that explanation actually made sense? Really, people like you are good for absolutely nothing more than making fun of, you do realize that right? Well, that and organizing underground resistances to take down massively influential and powerful chessmasters with mysterious goals I guess, but who cares about boring stuff like that?"

"Well, regardless of everything" spoke Shine. "I believe this remedies the 'one bed' situation, yes?"

"Yeah because god forbid mousey actually grow a pair and make a move on the girl. You do know you're both teenagers right, why is one bed even a problem!?"

"Chess, don't be crass." commented Shine while sipping yet more of her tea.

Chess paused, then gave shine a confused look.

"Bitch, have you MET me?"

Shine flashed him a quick but clear glare with her one good eye and chess sighed deeply before rolling his. "Whatever, I don't honestly have time for this-"

"You know that's a lie." interrupted shine with a smile.

"I DON'T have TIME for this! and I'm GOING to my TRAILER! Going to stop me?"

"You mean the one you don't have."

"Well if SOMEONE read my Christmas list that wouldn't be an issue would it!?"

"You don't celebrate Christmas."

"Of course I don't celebrate christmas. That would imply i give a shit about the religion. I just indulge in Christmas for free gifts from assholes who hate me the rest of the year but feel pressured to give me something because of societal norms, like every other american from the 21st century. Same goes with kwanza, hannukah, chinese new-year, and every single pagan nature celebration out there. Did you know there are 3 times more than there are days in the year?"

"Fascinating"

"Yeah, by my calculations you owe me approximately 1,429, 375$ in back-up gifts. When you gonna start paying up on that?"

"I figure somewhere around two weeks after the Jabberwock comes flying through the inter-dimensional space-bridge."

Chess frowned "Tch, bitch."

Shine smiled "That wasn't a question."

Chess' eyes went wide with realization and he threw his head back with another loud facepalm "Fuck! Three whole god-damned months down the fucking drain! Arrgh! Now I'm gonna have to go deal with THIS bullshit! Grrr, look, just hurry up with your social visit alright?"

While mumbling more to himself chess disappeared once more and shine got up from her seeming invisible chair to take a seat on the edge of the outfolded bed. "You'd never think it looking at him but he's one of the few people I'd ever trust with my life. Should anything ever happen, follow him and do exactly as he says."

Jason nodded silently, knowing this was mostly addressed to him.

Shine smiled her soft, calm, impenetrable smile and looked at Rue. "Well then, was there anything else you could think of? Something for yourself perhaps?"

 

[Ravenbelle]

Rue's eyebrows furrowed at Shine's most emotive reaction all day Her thoughts echoed Jason's spoken question. Don't know what?
She nearly jumped at Chess' sudden appearance in the corner. You'd think she'd be used to it by now. He was obviously frustrated...and his reason? It's a sofabed. Rue pursed her lips and looked at the floor again. How many times could she humiliate herself in one day. Unlike Jason, she had heard of a sofabed occasionally in her more modern-setting books. She had never seen one before, but she understood the mechanism. All this time when Jason was sleeping on a small couch and she could have checked for a sofa-bed! How come she never thought of that? Rue sighed. What good would reading do her if she never learned from the stories? Sure the sofa-beds were always in the hotel rooms where the main characters would sleep while on the run from something (she got a few of those stories from websites they didn't manage to ban in the library), but she should have known there might've been one here too. Just as Chess demonstrated by moving Shine to an invisible chair. She had never seen a mattress unfold like that so she wouldn't admit it, but it was pretty cool to watch. Her gaze shifted to Shine then, for she sensed the end was near for this little gathering, thank goodness. But then Chess spoke up again.

"Well, regardless of everything" spoke Shine. "I believe this remedies the 'one bed' situation, yes?"

"Yeah because god forbid mousey actually grow a pair and make a move on the girl. You do know you're both teenagers right, why is one bed even a problem!?"

"Chess, don't be crass." commented Shine while sipping yet more of her tea.

Chess never fails to make Rue turn as red as her hair every time he shows up.

As Shine and Chess continued their discussion, almost like strange friends she might add, Rue noticed that Shine drinks a lot of tea. Isn't that a lot of caffeine? Is she sleep deprived as well? It doesn't look like it from where Rue was sitting on the floor. The woman seemed to enjoy herself around Chess, even though their comments seemed like a teasing argument. She didn't miss the Wonderland reference either. This was the only time she ever saw Shine's friendly side. If you could call her interactions friendly in the least. They were close, but didn't quite make it..
If this is a social visit, Rue was no good with social skills. Not that she ever was, but still. It's pretty pathetic. She should be used to that though. Rue is pathetic in almost every way.

Once Chess took his leave, Shine seemed to address Jason at last and Rue looked up at him just as he nodded. It almost freaked her out all over again how willing he was to do exactly as Shine told him. Jason despises Chess, but for Shine he'd do anything, wouldn't he? Her throat tightened up and her head pounded. She shouldn't get so worked up about this. She had created quite a plan for escaping Brew...too bad it failed. Still, there would have been no Broken Mirrors without her. Is that really such a bad thing though, in hindsight? Half of those kids wouldn't be dead or worse right now if there was no rebellion. She didn't know anymore. Sometimes Rue doesn't really know anything at all, especially when her mind finds it difficult to focus on anything but the painful drums in her head.

That was part of the reason why she couldn't really answer Shine's (hopefully) last question very well. Rue stared up at her from the ground, again feeling small and mousey below that smile of hers. She didn't really consider the question anyway. She had what she needed and didn't even deserve that so there was nothing else for her to ask for. So she just lifted her shoulders in a little half-shrug before shaking her head no. Shine turned into two people for a second or two because of the movement, but she blinked the dizziness away again. She was going to leave now, right?

 

[Buio]

Jason looked over at his mentor. "Shine, was this really the only reason you came by? A social visit seems unlike you. If there's something more important to discuss we should get to it right away, no?"

The woman looked over to him and sighed lightly, tough it didn't seem as if there was any accusation in her tone or expression. She placed her tea down beside her on the bed and stood upright before them. "Jason, I have rather enjoyed mentoring you over these past few years. While your stay at Brewtsers was a difficult one, you never once let me down when it came to learning what I had to teach you. However I'm sad to say that whatever success I have had in guiding you, it was not also found in my being a suitable comrade to you or to your group. I have kept you in the dark, manipulating you from afar and holding my own position secure while guiding you down a path of revolution and danger. For that I am truly sorry."

Her attention now shifted off of him and included both of the teens in her address. "The purpose of this visit is, in short, to let you know that I intend to be more than just this caricature of a chessmaster for you both. I must apologize again, because in spite of everything I will have to continue holding you both in the dark for now, in order to keep us all safe. But the day will come when you are no longer under the gaze of the administrators, when they are too preoccupied with their other machinations to continue allocating resources to your location and retrieval. On that day, you will be free to go about your lives how you wish, granted of course that you still show appropriate prudence. But, should you chose to take it, i would like to extend a hand or camaraderie to the both of you. My organization will continue to fight the administrators and their collaborators for as long as they continue with their insane plans, and we want you two to join us. We want you two as comrades of ours in our fight, not to simply use you as tools of war like the administrators would have, but to give you a chance to be part of a family that would understand you and help you fight for the freedoms that would be denied to your kind. Of course, we won't force you to do anything, and even if you decide not to join us you we will still do everything in our power to keep you safe until they have given up on you. If you wish to leave all of this behind and live a life of normalcy away from this insane world once you're safe it is your free choice to do so. But I'm here today to let you know that there is an alternative should you wish it, a place that will accept you for who you are and stand by you against those who would harm you."

Jason stayed quiet. This was something incredibly heavy to digest and he couldn't react to it properly before having thought it through. Part of him felt excited. Part felt bewildered. Another was anxious. part of him was... relieved? But a large part of him was worried. How would this impact rue? what would be best for her? Before he could examine the situation further though he was pulled out of his reflection by shine's voice.

"You don't have to answer today. In fact I wouldn't accept an answer from you until you had given all of this proper thought."

Jason looked up and nodded. "Thanks, we'll give this proper consideration and give you and answer once we've reached a conclusion."

Shine nodded and gave the two a small smile shortly before blinking out of existence, ostensibly teleported away by chess. Jason turned to rue and gave her a small, slightly embarassed smile. "Well, so much for a relaxing morning. How about we put off all this seriousness for later and just go finish our breakfast?"

***

Shine nodded and gave the two a small smile. She then glanced in rue's direction and met her gaze, time froze for the two women. Inside Rue's mind a female figure emanating soft white light appeared behind her, placing her hands gently on the girl's shoulders and speaking softly in her ear.

[BCOLOR=#ffffff]"You are more powerful than you know, and more beautiful than you think. To see your true self: look not at the shadows of broken mirrors, but at the girl reflected in his eyes."[/BCOLOR]​

Then the dreamscape faded and, without warning, time picked up momentum again. Shine didn't look in rue's direction as she blinked out of existence.​

 

[Ravenbelle]

Jason finally asked the question she was still curious about since the beginning of this surprise visit and Shine definitely surprised her audience with her response. She stood once again, and sighed almost as if about to deliver a speech. Except when she spoke Rue knew it wasn't preplanned or insincere. Don't ask her how, because with Shine, who the heck knows anything? Rue only remembered what her hologram visit was like, just over a week ago and nothing much had changed but Rue's own opinion of the young woman. She spoke to Jason first, reminding the redhead of when she had said that she raised him well. Of course that line of thinking only brought up more questions her brain was too preoccupied to even hold onto right now. Just staying focused at the moment was getting harder past the drum set playing too loudly in her skull. But when she could manage, she agreed with Shine. Normally, she wouldn't accept apologies since the problem at hand is usually her fault, but in this case, Shine had kept them in the dark despite her name. And she couldn't pretend to fully understand all of her decisions. The woman was a mystery, but Rue did understand that it was for good reason. It all comes down to Jason. She believes in him. And she just has to trust that.

For once, Rue found something predictable in Shine's words when she addressed both of them. She has to continue to keep them in the dark. If only ignorance was bliss now. The things Rue would give to know the future now...

But as uninformed as she kept the teenagers, Shine really did seem to want to keep them safe. If it wasn't obvious her words and unexpressive face, it was in her actions. There was no doubting the effort she had put into assisting them in their escape from Brew and everything after. Now she seems to want to extend that kind gesture into the temporarily unforseeable future. The motivations for such kindness were not clear to Rue and at once she felt undeserving of such a commitment to her safety from a lady she had mistrusted since she showed up. Rue spared a glance at Jason, who seemed just as speechless as she was in the face of such a choice. What did he want? She would follow him to the ends of the earth, but she knew what she wanted. Of course if he chose the opposite route she would go with him, but she doubted he'd want to live 'normally'. Having gone this long learning from Shine, he wasn't going to try and return to what was lost before he showed up at Brew. She thought she knew him that well at least.

A quiet sigh of small relief escaped the girl on the floor when Shine let them think about the decision. Even though she thought she knew what she wanted, it would be better to talk about it with Jason first if anything. There was too much chaos in her right now to do anything or think about anything properly. She only nodded slightly when Jason agreed and just as Shine seemed about to dismiss herself, a deep emerald eye met Rue's sapphire pair.

She only saw a small smile before everything faded to black. For a moment, she thought she'd fainted, but she felt awake. Rue was in the same position as she was a second ago. Sure, this felt like a dream..but..not quite. Before she could panic or try to figure out what was going on, she felt a warm presence and then..soft comforting hands on her shoulders. Rue instantly relaxed and leaned into them, calming as if under a spell when the voice was heard right beside her ear. Rue closed her eyes and basked in the Shining white glow as she spoke. Her breath caught in her throat and without even a goodbye, Rue was thrust back into reality, jaw slack as Shine disappeared. ..Wha..?

The small girl was a bit disoriented when Jason spoke from above her place on the ground by the wall. She knew he had not seen what she had, so she winced away the blurriness, feeling way too much to process it all. The bottle of negative emotions from the bathroom wanted to join the flood of feeling, but she held it closed tight, staring up at Jason silently. She couldn't see her reflection there, in his eyes. Whether it was due to bad vision or she was too far, she didn't know, but the words spoken in her mind would be hard to forget even if her dark side wanted to reject them. Rue groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose with her thumb and index finger. There was way too much going on in her whirlwind of a cranium at the moment. Whatever it was that he said, she nodded absently in response and wondered if there was anything in the kitchen to help with intense headaches.

 

[Buio]

Jason noticed as she half-heartedly agreed to his proposal and started limping off towards the kitchen holding her head. With a small sight he walked after her, taking her by the shoulders and guiding her to the table, making her sit down. "Your headache's not passing huh? Wait one second."

He then went and got her a tall glass of water, but rather than rumage through the cupboards or refrigerator for some pain relief medicine, he instead went into the bathroom via the small connecting hall between the kitchen and living room proper and came out a few minutes later holding something in his hand. He walked back over to the table and sat down before placing two very familiar red tablets in front of the girl.

"Take them." he said with a neutral tone. "I smuggled this out with me when we left becaus ei thought something like this might happen. I know you've always dealt with headaches before, but they've been getting worse since we left brew and I'm almost positive it's because of your powers. These should make you feel better and, if they do, I'll ask shine about getting some more for you. and if not, then we'll know that's not something we have to worry about."

 

[Ravenbelle]

Deciding it'd be better than nothing to go check, Rue picked herself up off the carpet with the help of the wall and swayed off towards the cupboards in the small kitchen. She had to blink often to see clearly enough to get there, but it must have been pretty obvious how the headache was affecting her because she felt firm hands on her shoulders that guided her to sit down at the table. Jason's hands felt different than the woman's in her 'dream'. Shine that is. Had he witnessed his own vision like that or was it just her?

She frowned, shaking her head at his question in regards to her migraine (simply because headache has become an understatement.) Rue expected him to search through the drawers like she would, but instead he put a glass of water before her and walked out of the kitchen. Her eyebrows furrowed but that hurt too, not unlike the near-constant worried expression of hers worn throughout nearly every part of Shine's visit. Jason returned rather quickly as she was taking a sip from the glass with a slightly shaky hand and put it down when his hand left her with two red headache pills. She knew what they were for because she'd taken them before. Large blue eyes connected with Jason's when he told her to take them. Had he somehow...?
Yes. Yes, he had. Rue gasped softly, wondering why he thought of her and this when choosing what to smuggle out of that cursed hellhole. Her eyes drifted down when he mentioned how her headaches had been getting worse lately. She thought she'd been hiding it well enough, but this isn't Brewster. She can't just retreat to her room or avoid him because they live together now. He sees almost everything. She was just lucky to have that jacket to cover up her irritated skin from earlier. Rue gulped. What if it was only a matter of time until he found out? They are apparently to stay here for..years.

Rue simply nodded again and took the pills without a doubt that they were what Jason said they were. In any other situation, she would resist any attempt to get her to ingest medicine, but this is Jason and she's seen these pills before. They were large and she had recently emptied her stomach, but she was used to them and they slipped down to her stomach with that familiar feeling of a tight throat. Reaching out hesitantly, Rue gently squeezed Jason's closest hand and gave him a small, grateful smile. "Thank you." It wouldn't take long for the pills to kick in, so she just tried to relax, take deep breaths and forget the idea that if Jason was ever under some sort of malignant influence (an S-rank's doing or not), she could turn out naïve enough to continue to believe in him. She likes to think she knows him well enough to tell, but under most circumstances, she would not doubt him in the least.

When Rue let go of his hand, her anchor, her stomach growled and she wrapped her arms around it swiftly, smiling up at him with an embarrassed smile. "Soo...what's left of the breakfast you made?"

 

[Buio]

Jason chuckled at the loud growl, having more or less expected her to be hungry after the earlier incident, and looked over at the breakfast plates that had been left pretty much untouched (save for the stolen half stack from earlier) since they'd been interrupted just as they'd begun eating. "Well, my stuff has pretty much all melted into pasty, sugary, slop thanks to how many toppings i had on there when it was all left to sit (not that that will stop me from heating it up and eating it mind you). But your stuff still looks pretty edible, want me to pop it into the microwave? 'Course, it's not like i'd mind just making more either." he finished with a smile.

 

[Ravenbelle]

Rue's cheeks went red again when he laughed at her rumbling tummy. For a second she was reminded of Winnie the Pooh , thanks to the sugary syrup (close enough to honey) that she was craving. Watching his lips with nearly every word, Rue tried to copy his smile, ignoring all the negativity bombarding the back of her head and fighting its way to the forefront of her mind again. She was fighting back as best she could, but cracks in her fortress were made with the pounding of her soon-to-be-fading headache. Rue nodded to his question and deciding immediately that Jason had no reason to work on another breakfast, she said softly. "No it's fine. Microwaves are good." As much as she would have liked to stand and heat her food up on her own, she was afraid of making a mess or falling over since migraines prevent good balance (not that she usually has much of that normally). "Thanks." She smiled wanly back and him and finished the tall glass of water while he put her near-untouched plate of bacon, eggs and pancakes in the microwave for her.