Baby D&D

Discussion in 'THREAD ARCHIVES' started by Asmodeus, Jun 13, 2015.

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  1. It's time to add a new monster to the Pathfinder Bestiary. Lend me your rules.

    BABY (CR 1)
    Small Aberration, NE
    Init -10;

    AC 1, touch 1, flat-footed 1 (–9 Dex)
    All females get a +5 compulsion bonus on touch attacks against Babies.
    HP 1
    Damage Reduction 5/Shaking
    Fort -5, Ref -5, Will -5
    Babies gain a +2 Will Save against sleep-based magic

    Crawl 5ft., Totter 10ft.
    Babies move at double speed when not being observed, and triple speed when weapons or cliff edges are nearby.
    Bite +0 (1d1-1 damage)
    Rattle +1 (1d2-1 damage)
    Special Attacks: spit vomit (+2 if target is grappling)

    Str 1, Dex 1, Con 1, Int 1, Wis 1, Cha 20
    Base Atk -5; CMB +7 (+2 improved grapple vs hair); CMD 1 (-5 vs. trip)
    Climb +5, Perception -6, Disable Device (doll) +2, Escape Artist +15, Handle Animal +1, Knowledge (Planes... into the mouth) +2, Linguistics -20, Ride (Pram) +5, Stealth +7, Use Magical Device (See 'N Say) +5.

    Organization: solitary, or accompanied by a smug Lawful Evil bard who draws their picture on every wall they come across.

    Peekaboo: If a Baby is observing you, you may attempt a Stealth check as a free action by putting your hands in front of your face. If successful, the Baby is confused for 1 round.
    Oopsie: Babies suffer a -5 on perception checks to avoid ungated stairway traps.
    My, how you've grown: Babies gain +2 HP from every successful Fort save vs Disease.
    Monkey See: If a Baby witnesses a Barbarian using rage powers, it will change its alignment to Chaotic Evil and begin hurting dolls and small animals.
    Demoralizing Wail: Babies can cry for 50 rounds per day. For each round the Baby is crying, all enemies become Fatigued and must make a DC15 Will save or charge the Baby on their next turn.

    None. Encountering a Baby actually drains your own Gold Piece total by 80%. No save allowed.
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  2. They shouldn't have damage reduction against shaking because they're rather vulnerable to it.

    Also bonus to Will saves vs sleep? Psh, should be another vulnerability instead, but also have a feature that gives them a chance to wake up at random with a damage-causing wail.
  3. The thing after the slash is what gets PAST the damage reduction.

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  4. I had a pretty hearty laugh at this. Brilliant.
  5. Beyond being hilarious, is it also significant?
  6. I wouldn't dare say anything significant in General Chat.

    Also, I need additional rules. Gimme.
  7. Did you leave a bun in the oven Asmo?
  8. No, I can hate babies objectively.

    Also, all of you shut up and give me rules.
  9. Rules are nowhere near as fun as rumors.
  10. LOLWUT
  11. You caught me. I am in fact a Pathfinder noob.

    I'll go sit in the corner and be ashamed of myself.
  12. "Class Features". Is being a baby a class now? If so what level is it in this class, and at what level does it gain these abilities? Is it possible for a forty-something year old to multiclass into baby?

    What's the damage/effect of the Spit Vomit attack? +2 to what?

    How is their Base Attack Bonus in the negatives? That's not possible.

    What's the DC of the stealth check for Peekaboo?

    The bite and rattle attacks work at -5 BAB (which is impossible) plus their strength modifier, which should be -5. The attack bonus for both of these attacks should be -10.

    There are so many problems with their skill modifiers I'm not even going to bother commenting.

    Their AC too. Jesus Christ.

    The +2HP gained from their "My, how you've grown ability"... is that a +2 to their max HP? Do they heal +2HP? Is it a normal HP gain or is it temporary HP?

    Babies would fit into the Tiny size category, not Small, unless we're talking about some seriously massive babies.

    It's like you don't even play Pathfinder.
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  13. Each and every one of you suck an entire mountain of sweaty wrinkled balls.
  14. You should just tell @Tegan that you're ready to try now.
  15. Babies weighing less than 5lbs and left unattended can be moved with Mage Hand.

    -1 to dodge falling, un-anchored furniture.

    *3 solid years of peace of mind with the IUD--WOOT*
  16. Is this... Is this your and Tegan's way of announcing...?
  17. The same joke... over and over...
  18. Nerds.
    • Bucket of Rainbows Bucket of Rainbows x 1
  19. You're just mad you never got to try this with Lorn.
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