Are you a gossip and a trash talker?

Discussion in 'THREAD ARCHIVES' started by Diana, Jun 14, 2014.

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  1. I was reading THIS ARTICLE on my feed today! And it was a pretty close representation of my own experience and feelings with gossip and trash talking. >>

    We've pretty much all been there. I know maybe one or two people on the PLANET that are so full of goodwill and sunshine that they never have a cross word to say about anything.

    There is a quote that says "Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people." and the first time I saw it on one of those motivational image thingers it made me stop and think! O_O I used to be a gossipwhore and trash talked a lot. I had a very negative point of few about things and other people, and to top it off I was a self-righteous know it all twat. >> And that quote made made think about what kind of person I was being! I didn't like that quality in other people, so why the hell was I doing it?

    These days I still sometimes slip up and fall in to the gossip or trashtalk trap. T_T But I tryyyyyyy to make an effort not sit around around talking about how shitty other people are being, and try to talk about positive qualities instead.

    Are YOU a gossip or a trash talker? Where do you usually slip up?

    Tell us about your experiences and stories!
    #1 Diana, Jun 14, 2014
    Last edited: Jun 14, 2014
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  3. Yup.
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  4. I rarely ever trash talk and gossip about people. When that occasion arises, it is usually to warn someone. Like, for instance, at work the other day.

    Where I work, it's really hot. At least 20 degrees hotter than the outside weather. So, as a result, the new people coming in on their first day hardly making it past their lunch break before quitting. But, whenever I find myself in conversation, I try to help them out by telling them who not to talk to (unless they wanted their conversations spread around the factory), and who the tattle-tails are. Stuff I had to learn the hard way.
  5. Sometimes when someone (eg: a boss, a regular, a cashier where I shop) will piss me off and I need to vent, but I would never say anything personally rude, and when I do vent, it's never to anybody who knows them (like, I wouldn't vent to a coworker about another coworker, and I wouldn't vent about my brother to my sister)
  6. I vent amongst people I know before expressing my frustrations directly. If that's what is meant by "trash-talking", then yeah, I do it. I think everyone does, though. I consider it my buffer zone. I'll get what I'm thinking out into the open to help relieve some of the tension I feel and to refine my thoughts on how to best word what I want to say without potentially offending anyone else.

    I don't gossip in general, though. That is to say, I don't go around telling everyone someone elses dirty laundry. Secrets shared to me are kept strictly between myself and the other part(ies), unless given specific permission to tell people. Otherwise, those secrets will cease to exist at my passing, and not a moment sooner.
  7. You know, there's a certain saying: "Show me someone who doesn't gossip and I'll show you a person who doesn't care about people." Which is, essentially, me. I don't trash talk, not out of good will and positive attitude (ha, ha), but mostly because I find it to be a really poor way to invest your time. It would be sad if my friends were so boring we'd have to resort to badmouthing someone to get a few cheap laughs. I'm pretty straightforward when I have a problem with someone; they are usually the ones to know it first and they mostly respect my wish not to get involved with them more than necessary. (Unless their sarcasm detector is broken.)
    That being said, I do have a fairly recent experience with trash talking; one of local bored wives who apparently doesn't know what to do with her time and all the money her husband brings home started badmouthing my mother, calling her all sorts of things that aren't appropriate enough to be mentioned here and accusing her of sleeping with... basically the entire town? It was so absurd I thought it was funny at first, but the smile froze on my face when she turned the whole city against her in a few months. If it happened to me, I'd probably shrug it off without a commotion because a) the ones I hold dear wouldn't believe it, b) my level of care for opinions of those who don't belong among my loved ones is abysmally low, but my mom was really depressed about it. I went to have a small chat with the lady in question, probably creating yet another mortal enemy in the process, and then started making up outrageous rumors about her as a social experiment. Results: People will believe anything if you devote reasonable amount of efforts into your rumor-spreading spree. It's almost scary.
  8. Generally, no, I try not to. If I'm mad and lack self control, I might talk some trash, but I mostly don't mean it. Mostly. It depends on who the person is, really.
  9. I only trash talk when I'm behind the wheel of a car on the track or am about to do something needlessly dangerous and stupid. And really I like to think of it as my ego boost. Because there are times when a little more then max confidence is needed. As for gossip I find it such an utter waste of time I seriously wonder why the whole concept exists.
  10. I don't care for gossip. Thanks to my sisters though, I can tune that out really well. My eyes just glaze over and I nod my head, then when they're done I go on my way. xD I do a fair amount of trash talking about human beings as a whole, though. I came to terms that I'm an angry person in a world of people who piss me off. Trash talking is one of the healthier outlets I have, otherwise I am known to lash out more violently. If people would stop being assholes, so would I. For far too long, I tried being the 'nice guy', even apologizing for things that aren't my fault. Fuck that noise. It does nothing at all. >:[

    I let the hate flow through me. *Force lightnings her enemies*
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  11. No.

    Because I know what it is like to be that guy that everyone is snickering or suddenly hate for no reason due to gossip or trash talk. If I have an issue with you, I won't pussy foot around behind your back. I will face you head on and give you the chance to explain or defend yourself. Shit doesn't get done with whispers, they get done when you put your foot up people's asses and get the job done efficiently. There's no point to it and once you do it, people know that they can't trust you.
  12. I'm that person that talks smack on the trash talkers @_@

    Me a my brother would talk smack on the loud kids on his buses that bullied him when he told them to be quiet.

    Now, if like to say the my trash talking abilities are used for good and you'll never hear me talk I'll about people unless they lack common sense, I'm Nonsense Intolerant, is I suppose it seems this way. :|
  13. I'm a gossip with my family, big time. Living in Florida, and everyone I know in Maryland, gossip is pretty much what I live for. Considering that some of the things tht go on in my family should be on Jerry Springer, it's impossible for me not to gossip. (No incest, but lots of daughter's messing with their mother's boyfriends, psycho girlfriends who throw themselves down stairs and call the cops to say their boyfriend did it. Tons of fun stuff that makes me feel normal.)

    I've never been much of a trash talker though, unless it's to my husband, then all bets are off.
  14. Unfortunately, I've become more of a trashtalker and a gossip. Three years ago, I wouldn't even think about that.

    But the people I've befriended and the people I've met were not people I should have. I've already severed my ties with them but their behavior and attitude lingers with me.

    Not something I'm proud of, and I'm trying to stop, so it's taken some time for me to moderate and be judicious with what I say.
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  15. It depends how aggravated I get with a person... if they deserve to be spoken about in a bad way then I'll talk smack. I'm generally very fond of people though.
  16. Ugh, no? All trash talkers are dirty and stupid, like ****** and ******* and that one really stupid girl, ***. God, I hate those people.
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  17. Omg. I'm ashamed to admit that I had this problem for a while last year. For a couple of months straight, I was just complaining about everything, people included, whether or not they did something wrong. I guess I was just throwing blame around because I felt so out of control in my own life.

    The way I recognized my new bad gossiping habit was when one of my friends started to tick me off. He was always dishing smack on people and we were used to him, but when he started to dish garbage about me to other people and then, dish about those people to me, I realized what I was looking at was compulsive gossiping. And I felt super disgusted in myself as a result.

    I started working on dropping the entire gossip habit after that. It was hard because living with three other females makes it near impossible to duck and hide during those gossip sessions. The good thing, I can't get over my disgust. I can still vividly remember staring at his face across the restaurant table, wondering when he would stop talking trash and feeling horrified thinking "Is this the way people see me?" I knew I wasn't that extreme or even close to the level he was at, but the thought horrified me enough to break the bad streak.
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