Pahn

monstrous
Original poster
LURKER MEMBER
FOLKLORE MEMBER
Posting Speed
  1. 1-3 posts per week
  2. One post per week
  3. Slow As Molasses
Online Availability
Anytime, I have no life.
Writing Levels
  1. Adept
  2. Advanced
  3. Douche
  4. Adaptable
Preferred Character Gender
  1. Male
  2. Nonbinary
  3. Transgender
  4. Primarily Prefer Male
Genres
Fantasy, romance, slice of life, anti-hero stories, "you're our only hope", fandom non-canons, soft scifi, transhumanism, magical girls, horror, suspense / mystery, detective noir, fractured fairytales
alladading-banner.jpg

The only hope the kingdom has rests with
a beautiful witch,
a very loud princess,
a clumsy thief,
and a fairy that likes to set things on fire.

Silence.

That is what Leilankro Vrajjin heard, or did not hear, when she stepped out of her little cottage. Sure, she could hear the birds and the insects, but that was it. The usual chatter from the market that carried over wasn't present, and the sailors from the port down the stony road were oddly quiet. Sensing that something wasn't quite right, Lei grabbed her shawl and slipped on her sandals before making her way towards the heart of the town.

It was a small town, right between the walled in palace and the nobility housings, the ocean, and a chain of mountains. Things were always quiet in their part of the world, but they typically weren't that silent. It was a worrisome situation indeed and the witch took it upon herself to investigate this oddity. The kingdom of Wrachuning had become her home for quite some time now, and she wasn't about to let another witch or wizard ruin her little piece of heaven.

On her way down the road, Lei came across a few carts with their rider asleep in the front seat. A couple of them, they had outright slid down their seat and fell in the back! The witch chuckled and figured nothing was all too bizarre with that, everyone enjoyed a nap once in a while in the middle of the day, basking in the sun! It was only once she arrived in the marketplace that she noticed it.

Every single person was asleep.

Wrapping her shawl tighter around her shoulder, the woman peaked in the windows of the stores and without fault, everyone she saw was asleep. Some were snoring so loud she wondered how ANY person around them wasn't awake, and that bothered her. Readjusting the rings around her fingers, she whispered something in another tongue and blew white smoke into one of the merchant's face. And waited. And waited. And waited... Impatient, Lei did it a second and third time, on another person, and another... But no one woke up.

"What the hell is going on here?! Who's fucking with my people?" Silence, again. "Aight, I don't got time to check everywhere 'round here."

Lei the witch rubbed her hands together, closing her eyes and whispering another incantation. The more she rubbed, the louder she chanted, and soon there was bright red smoke around her hands. She didn't stop there though - she continued to cast her spell until there was a thick cloud of red smoke around her.

"UP!" The witch bellowed as she threw her hands up, releasing the cloud. It followed her instruction and went up and up and up, until it covered the village with its redness. "CLAP!" Thunder and lightning bolts suddenly erupted from the red cloud, shaking the ground and brightening the already sunny day.

It was quite the scene, but Lei figured it was the best way to get attention. Anyone still awake, at least. How the hell was everyone here asleep, and she wasn't?! Did someone not think her important enough to curse too?! As that thought crossed her mind, another one, a more timid thought, crawled from the back of her head and slipped out of her mouth.

"Alladading...!"
 
No matter what people thought of them being kind and delicate and all that, fairies were fucking noisy. Half of the humming in the woods was fairies buzzing around, and Puck was, one could say, the life of the party. Whenever he was around, all the fairies in the vicinity got louder. So you can imagine how disconcerting it was when the forest suddenly went quiet. One minute, three fairies were anxiously buzzing around him, scolding him as he started causing flowers to catch fire one by one (and nothing else), the next, they were all gone. He looked around to see where they had gone and lo and behold, they were on the ground. They didn't have the good grace to be dead, so he found them asleep instead. In fact, everyone was asleep.

The King and Queen of the fairies who had known him for some time would likely assume that this would be a pleasing turn of events for him, if they weren't also asleep. But as they usually were about him, they'd be wrong to think so. He blew things up and set things on fire and used his magic for mischief and they thought it was because he didn't like people? He fucking loved people. Or rather, he loved fucking with people. If no one was awake for him to piss off, what was even the point?

Frowning slightly, he zipped out of the forest. It seemed like for the first time in a while, he'd have to properly use his full strength as a magic user. How boring. Spinning in a little circle in the air, he began to set out a pattern to detect conscious life. It was more complicated than simply detecting life in general, but he kept the range within a half-mile and started doing sweeps through all of Wrachunung. Wrachunung was where he'd been born, in the branches of a tree burned down after a forest fire. It was his home. He could probably move somewhere else and if people were awake there, mess with them, but he'd rather figure out what was going on here. He impatiently spread the net a little wider. It was gonna be a long day....
 
For Naveen, it had been a rather typical day so far. Waking up, scrounging about for food, and then his ever present quest of collecting whatever he could, be it more food, shinies, or best of all, bananas. And now, as he sped away from someone's angrily waving fist, he was rather proud of himself; he'd only crashed once when he'd entered the shop. His eyes had caught sight of a brand new shiny purple hookah, and it was just sitting there, practically begging him to pick it up.

Unfortunately he'd tripped over the pipes of the other hookahs on his way to his prize, causing himself to be discovered by a rather irate shopkeeper. This, of course, was nothing new for the intrepid thief. He barely managing to escape the first smelly shoe that came flying after him. Giggling at his victory, he was a little too late in dodging the second one, smacked the back of his head, causing him to fall flat on his face.

"Don't be hurt!" Pushing himself up with one hand, he looked at the hookah still nestled between his arm and his body. To his immense relief, there was no scratch.

"PHEW!" A huge sigh later, Naveen was back up on his feet, ready to skedaddle... but he didn't. Head tilted, he looked down at the shopkeeper, the one who was missing his shoes. It seemed the fellow had fallen asleep right in the middle of the street!

"Uh.... hey, are you alright?" Tentatively approaching the man, Naveen crouched and poked the shopkeeper's cheek. All he received in response was a loud, wheezy snore.

"Huh, well that's weird. You should probably not run so much if you're going to get tired like this." He stood up and nodded. "Okay, well, I'm going now. Goodbye."

The young man was ready to return to the old and broken crate he called home when the sudden sound of thunder caused him to jump in fright, bug eyes and arms spread out, inadvertently leading him to drop the hookah.

"Noooo!" His beautiful, purple prize was shattered on the dusty street! Tears stung Naveen's eyes, and he would have probably continued bemoaning the hookah's fate if he hadn't conveniently just then looked up at the sky, taking note of the red cloud.

"Well that's different. Hm..." Easily distracted and now scratching his smooth chin as if it sported a full grown beard, he decided to walk in the same direction to discover why in the name of Ali Baba there was a big fluffy red cloud in the sky.

He was, after all, a rather curious monkey person.​
 
A loud rumbling filled the room, like a rockslide somehow sprung up out of nowhere. The tallfolk of the inn looked up in awe (or terror, it was always hard to tell with these scaleless people and their wiggly-wormy lips) as the creator of the sound hopped spryly down the stairs. Haaksa liked stairs. Her home had been all sloping tunnels, but stairs were fun, even when they were made for big people like the humans and elves. Haaksa jumped down from one step to the next, and with each landing came the quiet thud of her weight followed by the hellish clatter of bone and bark and bits of metal clacking against hard scales.

The rumbling had, of course, been Haaksa's stomach. She trotted over to the counter that the innkeeper and his wife were cowering behind like it would somehow protect them. It was tall, but Haaksa was used to dealing with tall things now. She took a running jump and latched onto the edge of the counter with her clawed fingers, digging into the front for extra purchase with the claws on her feet, and ended up with her head (skull headdress and all) looking over the top of the counter at the awestruck (okay, probably terrified) humans.

"Food!" The demand was shouted, not in her loudest voice but in a very demanding one all the same, and it made the people wince.

"Uh, yes, mi- Princess." Haaksa grinned at the portly man for remembering her proper title, but he flinched when he saw it. These smoothskins were weak to be so frightened of someone with pointy teeth. "Your payment included a meal, so, ah, what would you like? We have--"

"Pigmeat!" This yell was quieter, but full of excitement. "Pigmeat is Haaksa's favorite!"

"Pigmeat." The flat and expressionless way the innkeeper's wife said the word seemed rather confused, so Haaksa took in a deep breath to explain that pigmeat is meat from pigs, but the woman rushed on and proved she was just playing stupid instead of actually being stupid. "Very well. Would you like ham, bacon, or pork sausage? I think we also have some pork chops left over from last night, though they'll be a bit dry now."

"Yes." The humans looked confused again. Haaksa figured this was probably because she hadn't yelled the word. She was feeling generous, so she gave them what they clearly wanted. "Yes!"

The innkeeper rubbed a hand over his face and muttered something under his breath, but his wife put on a shaky smile and asked in that are-you-sure-you-aren't-an-imbecile voice that humans liked to use on each other. "Uh, which kind would you like, Princess?"

So she was stupid after all, not just playing. That was diappointing. "All!" The humans did that blank stare thing again, but after a while Haaksa was sitting on top of a table with a platter of delicious pigmeats in front of her, so she was willing to be benevolent and forgive them their stupidity. They couldn't help being born with inferior brains, after all.

When she finished and was casually gnawing on the wooden platter, Haaksa looked around and found everyone in the room had fallen asleep. She had heard that tallfolk did something called fainting, where they went to sleep when something scared or shocked them enough. Probably they were all just so terrified of how quickly she could eat pigmeat and so they all fainted. Smoothskins were such weak creatures that it would not surprise her in the slightest.

Haaksa left them and exited the inn to find, to her delighted surprise, that people on the street had fainted too. Her powers were clearly immense to have done so much. She'd been out in the wilderness for a few months, and somewhere along the way she must have improved her eating skills so much that she could incapacitate smoothskins without even touching them. She was pondering ways to profit from this skill when she saw a big red cloud appear in the sky not very far away. She had no plans for the day other than to wander this town and find something fun to do, and spooky red noisy clouds sounded fun, so she scampered through the streets and over some of the fainted people to find the source of it.

The source, as it turned out, was a smoothskin lady with shinies on her. A lot of shinies, on her hands and arms and even in her hair. She cautiously approached with her bone club and staff raised, ready to smack the lady in the knees if she did anything funny. "Why you no fainted, shiny smoothskin? Haaksa eated pigmeats and smoothskins fainted. Not impressed with Haaksa's eating skills maybe? Haaksa can find more pigmeats and try again." Haaksa grinned at the shiny smoothskin, showing off all her pointed teeth and the scraps of ham and bacon stuck between some of them.
 
While Leilankro had not expected other people to be awake (it was Alladading's curse after all), she had most definitely NOT expected the folks that had popped up, intrigued by the cloud. First was a man rather short for his kind. The witch instantly sensed that he wasn't quite human, and the swaying tail sprouting from his backside confirmed her suspicions. A shifter? He was quite a bit younger than her but he appeared to sport a sense of fashion similar to hers; colourful clothes, loose or tight in just the right places.

"Hello, boy. Who are y--" Lei was interrupted by another kind of rumbling, different from the thunder she had produced earlier. Clicking her tongue in annoyance, the witch turned around only to be faced with a kobold.

Having travelled through many kingdoms and having a cultured background, the woman was able to identify the kobold. She was royalty, that much was certain. Not many commonfolk kobolds wore pieces of their ancestors as accessories, and this one had at least three different kobold remains on her person. She was shorter than the last royalties she had encountered, but perhaps that meant she was this much more ferocious.

Lei cleared her throat and curtsied lightly, just as a sign of politeness rather than submission. Her finger tapped her throat twice and out came guttural noises that the shifter-with-a-tail probably wouldn't understand.

"Princess Kobold, awake not sleeping? Wrachuning, home?" Her Draconic was far from perfect and she felt slightly embarrassed about it, but she wanted to avoid any kind of confrontation with the princess. She decided to continue in her normal voice, addressing both the newcomers. "Let me introduce myself, I'm Leilankro Vrajjin. You may call me Lei, it's a bit less of a mouthful. Forgive me princess, I haven't spoken low draconic in decades. The people, they're asleep from a curse, I just don't know why I... Why WE aren't. Have you met anyone on your way that wasn't asleep?"
 
Puck had forgotten how much energy hard spells took. He'd kept spinning around, spreading his net wider and wider, as he got more and more impatient with it, until it stretched over all of Wrachunung. He wasn't the only one awake, it turned out. There were clusters of conscious life scattered here and there, most particularly in the swamp-like areas. Anyone watching the tiny fairy would find it rather odd, as he suddenly went still and began waving his hands in the air, as if touching an invisible web, and that wouldn't be totally far from the truth, either. Parsing it out into maps, he did an evaluation on the species available. It was almost all... monsters. Or what they'd call monsters, very non-human-like. How primitive. Besides the monsters there was a tiny little cluster, with just a very small monster, one human that seemed a bit off, and a shifter. Much farther away, and past the monsters, was a mass of something he couldn't quite make out. It was covered with concealment charms up the wazoo, and while he could maybe crack those if he really really needed to, it was hard from this far away and so terribly inconvenient. He turned his head towards the strange little cluster and finally noticed the hints of red dissipating in the wind. Looks like he'd missed the obvious, hadn't he? Shame on him.

With a (literally) sharp-toothed grin, Puck built himself a spell to shorten the distance he had to fly, and shot forward, barreling towards the odd group. It took him some time- there was only so much magic could do - but he soon found himself intentionally slamming head first, a tiny fairy canon, right into the back of the shifter male. He had to make himself an entrance, after all.
 
When at last Naveen reached the source of the fluffy red cloud of smoke, he wasn't too surprised to find two somebodies who were awake. See, he had been wandering looking up at the sky, not really paying much attention to his surroundings. Was that dangerous? Indeed. He had tripped over countless sleeping people and landed on the ground more than a few times. However, this was as habitual to the monkey boy as eating... or probably even more of an occurrence, truth be told.

Stopping before the tall woman, he would have probably replied her question if he hadn't noticed the small... er... well, he wasn't quite sure what this being was, except it was shorter than him, looking rather like an enlarged lizard person in his opinion, with more bony objects and accessories than Naveen had seen on a person... ever.

He looked back and forth between the two, unsure what strange language the woman was speaking in. It sounded weird, so thankfully the woman decided to switch to what was normally spoken around these areas.

"Hello Lei, I'm Naveen- wait, you're a princess?" The monkey shifter stared at the short one, eyes blinking rapidly. "You sure don't look like any princess I've heard of- Ow!" Before that sentence could have ended, Naveen found himself hurtling forward from some unknown force, arms flailing wildly as he tried and failed to keep himself from falling face first onto the street... again.​
 
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Haaksa stared up at the shiny smoothskin with her mouth hanging open for a long while. She wasn't sure how long had passed when the simmering rage bubbled up into a geyser, but someone nearby was falling on their face and it was almost enough to make her laugh and interrupt her oncoming tirade. Almost.

"You dare butcher the tongue of the mighty dragons?!" To those who didn't speak the language, it would have sounded like a barrage of nonsensical harsh and guttural noises mixed with hisses, like a snake with a very bad cough. For someone not particularly well versed in the language, is was probably near indecipherable due to the speed with which Haaksa spoke.
"I should flay you alive for butchering the grandest of all languages, beginning with your tongue for daring to sully it in the first place. Were I not a kind and generous princess, I would beat you to death where you stand with the femur of my great great grandfather, King Sarkios the Sibilant of Tall Mountain. Stick to your barbaric human language lest you make me change my mind."

With that out of her system, Haaksa was feeling cheerful enough to bop the fallen man on the back of his head with the femur held in her left hand. "Big dumbhead, don't fall down. Or maybe sleeping now? Street is bad bed. Why-" Haaksa spotted the little fairy and immediately dropped what she was saying, as well as her femur club and her staff, and bared her sharp teeth in a grin as she scrambled to grab it.
 
Puck had not expected to be attacked first thing. Usually it took a bit for people to get over the shock to go for him, but that didn't make it any less amusing. As the short monster went for him, he swooped away, laughing. "Too slow, too slow, little monster." It was probably hypocritical for the two-inch tall fairy to be calling anyone little, but no one had ever accused Puck of being reasonable. He alighted on top of the strange human's head for just a moment, still laughing rudely and blowing raspberries cheerfully at the shortie from his high perch, ready to flit away again if the lady reached up to grab him in stead. "What's an ugly little monster like you doing over here, eh? Eh? All the other awake monsters are closer to the swampy areas." He waved his hand randomly and massive flowers popped out of the staff she'd been holding before she'd dropped it, those same flowers bursting into flames just like that.
 
"Ow, again!" Naveen had been attempting to get to his hands and feet, that is his hands hand been in the process of pushing against the ground, when he was soundly bopped in the back of the noggin. He blinked at the ground, nose still smashed against it, breathing in the dust and dirt which consequently caused him to let out a huge sneeze. The result of this was him lifting himself in momentum and settling down on his knees, rubbing almost violently at his nose.

"I am not asleep!" he sputtered in what he hoped was a reassuring manner. Of course, it was anything but. "I was-"

Ceasing his prattling, Naveen realized there was someone other than the small... whatever, and the tall woman. This tiny person was also rather rude it seemed. A bug- maybe a scarab? Naveen squinted his eyes, trying to follow after the flying creature, though he was thoroughly distracted by the flowers that were now burning.

"Agh!" Hands smacked against his cheeks in anguish. "Why would you do that? They were so pretty too!"
 
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Just as Lei turned to take another look at the boy with a tail, he fell forward and one of those firecracker fairies popped up. Great, she thought to herself, exactly what we needed. And when the little miscreant began burning flowers, the witch rolled her eyes and brought her attention back to the kobold. If all possible end-of-the-world scenarios, this was perhaps the furthest from ideal she could have possibly imagined. She was pretty sure no one had dared imagined such a group.

"Look, princess, I didn't mean to insult you and your five grandfathers. I wasn't sure if you spoke the common tongue, but clearly you do. Now," Lei snapped her fingers and a wave of blue smoke covered the kobold's burning possessions, extinguishing the fire. "Hey, you, fairy - did you just say that everyone was asleep save for the monsters in the swamp?"

It was hopeless to try and catch it to make it talk, and she wasn't about to exhaust herself with using her magic to catch the little bug. Fairies had somewhat of a endless pool from which they could draw their magic, but she had had to learn the craft and hone her natural talent. Lei simply hoped the firecracker would calm down.

"Naveen, right? Did you notice anyone else asleep on your way here?" The witch extended her ring-covered hand and produced a handkerchief with her other one, giving it to the poor fellow covered in snot and dirt.
 
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The little fairy was far too quick. Haaksa cackled as it sped away, but she chased it as best she could and ignored whatever the not-sleeping man was saying. She was surprised the fairy could talk, but that made no difference. "Haaksa wanna pull off fairy wings, getta wish! Stop flying a--" The kobold princess let out a startled and outraged squawk as she saw flowers blooming from her temporarily discarded staff. It quickly transformed into a bloody, murderous howl as the flames appeared.

Haaksa left off of her chase and ran back to her sacred artifacts. She picked up the femur club and was ready to try to beat the fire to death, but some spooky blue smoke covered it. Haaksa looked around for the source of the new threat and saw it was the shiny smoothskin, so she bared her teeth menacingly and waved her club in the air. That seemed to work, and the smoke disappeared, leaving a mangled and charred staff laying on the ground. The bone affixed to the top seemed fine though, so hopefully her ancestors had not been enraged by the slight to their honor.

With the now very splintery wood of the staff resting in her scaly hand, and smooth bone in the other, Haaksa marched toward the shiny smoothskin, ready to pay a blood price to ensure that her ancestors were pleased and restful... until she remembered that the shiny smoothskin could do magic. So could the fairy, but fairies were small so their magic wasn't worth being afraid of. A big lady though? Haaksa remembered that weird lightning, and she could only imagine what horrors could be done to her by a tall smoothskin's magic.

She stopped a good ways away, far enough back to be able to still see the fairy sitting up on top of the scary smoothskin's head and point the desecrated staff at it. "Haaksa gonna pull off your wings, wish for happy ancestors. War!" With the word screeched to declare her eternal enmity for the tiny, evil fairy, Haaksa cautiously edged away from the scaryshiny smoothskin and stopped just before bumping into the not-sleeping guy. The first thing she noticed, now that she wasn't mocking him for being on the ground, was that he had a tail. Her own tail started whipping back and forth, slapping sharply into the man's leg. "Tailfriend! Thought you were smoothskin, notta smoothskin. Wanna help Haaksa get fairy wings?"
 
"Oh, everyone's asleep." Puck interjected nastily when the funny lady spoke, not giving the shifter boy any time to talk. "I checked." His voice was smug, though the woman wasn't nearly as amusing as he'd hoped she be. just calmly using whatever cloud stuff she used to put his fire out. She hadn't tried to catch him, so he supposed she had some experience with fairies. Perhaps even with him specifically. Most fairies hadn't perfected the art of pissing people off the way he had. Most disapproved of him for trying.

His skill did seem to be working on the little monster, though. He cackled gleefully as the strange creature huffed at him loudly and furiously. "Not much good at the common tongue is you, little monster?" He added, thumbing his nose at her, not that she could necessarily see something from that far away when he was oh so small. "Stupid, slow, and ugly. It's the golden triad." His nasally laugh made the words somehow more irritating than they already were, and he was speaking nice and loud so everyone could hear him.

The female human seemed to be almost something of a shield between the female non-human, and it didn't seem like she was about to go for him, so he settled himself more comfortably atop the woman's head, still smirking at the kobold. "Anywho. Besides us, all of them are fast asleep. The people, the fairies, their little helper friends. Doesn't seem like anybody's dead, but the only ones awake are the three of us and a large assortment of the Primitives, most of them in the swamp. Haven't checked outside of Wrachunung, but other than us, there's some weird tower all covered in magic." He grinned, his sharp little teeth glinting in the sunlight. Though she couldn't see the expression, it practically oozed from every word of the sentence he spoke next. "Friend of yours, perhaps?" Puck was annoying, insensitive, and irresponsible, but unfortunately for everybody else, he wasn't stupid. The tower was strange, he knew he didn't know what was going on, and the two jokers with them clearly didn't have a hand in it. Stood to reason the weird lady was Up to Something.
 
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Letting out a loud sniffled, Naveen let his hands slowly drop from the sides of his face, looking over at Lei to answer her question. "Uhhh..." Since the fairy didn't really give him a chance to speak, the monkey boy simply listened, head tilted to a side as he blinked at Lei. Others asleep too? That was strange. He wondered why. Only one man had been chasing him, how did everyone else get so tired-

His deep thoughts and pondering were soundly interrupted by a sharp smack against his leg, and then continuous ones that followed. "Ai!" he yelped, looking down and then to the culprit, the shorter one's tail. What's her- It seemed Naveen didn't have to search the depths of his memory for her name, the kobold generously providing it with her very loud proposition to help get fairy wings.

"Uh... uhm..." He began fiddling with his fingers, unsure of what to reply. On the one hand, the rather rude fairy needed to learn a lesson! On the other hand, wasn't pulling off his wings kind of... extreme?! Naveen could only imagine how it would feel to have his tail plucked off. Major ouch. Brown eyes glanced up at the taller Lei's head where the fairy was sitting, a rather self satisfied look on his tiny face.

Now Naveen wasn't stupid, but he wasn't one to pay attention when something important was being talked about. Not to mention he already had something on his mind. To grab a fairy or not? He'd bet he could reach him, but if he did, what if Lei decided to do something? That prospect was a little scary.

Then again, for her small stature Haaksa was rather intimidating... and loud. And she was a princess, even if she didn't look like one.

I'll just try and- "Hup!" He lurched forward, trying to grab at the fairy with both hands. Unfortunately Naveen stepped on a rock, causing him to trip. He waved his arms frantically, trying to keep his balance. Ultimately he failed, but this time he managed to land on his knees instead of his face. One might even call it a success.​
 
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"Wha--!" For a moment Lei wanted to chase off the little firecracker fairy at the top of her head, especially with the other two weirdos looking like they were about to jump at her, but on a second thought she quieting whispered, "Air wall," and an invisible wall made of compacted air surrounded her. It wasn't very high, but the other two weren't very big or tall either, so that would have to suffice for the moment. The fairy was her only chance at getting more information about all of this.

After readjusting a few bracelets and rings, Lei cleared her throat and replied to what the fairy had said. "Is that so. It appears this... curse is affecting a lot more folks than I thought. All the way over to the tower, is it? I do happen to know who lives there, but calling us friends isn't very accurate, Mister...?" It was so very strange to be talking with someone she couldn't see but feel on the top of her head, but she'd seen weirder.

With a quick flick of the finger accompanied with the usual cling-clang her her multiple metal bracelets, Lei muttered something and suddenly the clumsy monkey boy was back on his feet and he would feel the strange support of a block of air gently pressing against his torso to help him keep balanced. The witch's eyes peered at the kobold princess but decided to ignore her; she was small enough to be thrown into the air with a scoff. "Alladading lives in that tower, with his servants and apprentices. For the magnitude of this curse, it wouldn't surprise me if he'd been the one to cast it and used the support of the foolishly eager to please apprentices. Why though?" Lei wasn't expecting any of these fools to have an answer, but she voiced her thoughts out loud anyway.
 
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"Puck." The tiny fairy supplied helpfully, when the funny human inquired after his name. He did not ask for hers, though she had yet to introduce herself to him. This was proving to be a fairly interesting conversation, what with the lady doing the magicks, and all that. Sadly, she seemed the sort that was boring once you got used to her. The ones that didn't get upset all that easily lost their charm fast, especially if they got in the way of you upsetting the simple ones. He picked his nose, lazily, readjusting himself atop her head. "Alladading, huh? Haven't heard that name in a while. You sure you're not buddies with Mr. Incompetent Evil Mastermind? You seem to know an awful lot about how he works." The fairy said it in an off-handed fashion, not really thinking she was friends with the old sorcerer.

Already getting bored of the conversation, the little troublemaker suddenly jolted upright and flew closer to the clumsy monkey, just a little bit out of reach. "Hey. If you listen to the stupid little monster, you'll get stupider. But if you do catch me and manage to pull my wings off, would you wish for a brain or a sense of balance?" He placed a cheek against his fist and positioned himself so it looked like lying on his stomach on the floor, ready for storytime. Except, of course, he was hanging midair, with his wings working furiously to keep him bobbing in approximately the same place. He kept one eye on the kobold, in case it jumped at him.
 
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