ABC Style - How to Lose a Job

Discussion in 'THREAD ARCHIVES' started by Iwaku, Jan 2, 2012.

  1. List ALPHABETICALLY ways to lose your job.


    A - Allowing hobos to eat all of the fried chicken.
    B - Bellowing at your boss at the top of your lungs.


    A - Aggravating all of your coworkers with Peruvian flute players.
  2. Bringing your sexual fetishes to work.
  3. Clogging up the employee toilets
  4. Drugging it up in front of a customer
  5. Eating your bosses handmade lunch.
  6. Figuring you may as well make 200 copies of your butt and staple them to walls throughout the building.
  7. Growing marijuana in the supply closet.
  8. Hiding under your boss's desk until he notices you.
  9. Inking said message onto your bosses' desk, "It was me who farted in your salad."
  10. Jumping across all the desks like a monkey imitating your boss at last years christmas party
  11. Kissing your boss's wife at the New Years party.
  12. Leaving your toupee next to your boss's latte.
  13. Moving your bomb collection into building and the bombs are in inconvenient places that will also go off if touched.
  14. Not showing up for work.
  15. Ordering porn under the company's name.
  16. Pretend to fall asleep while snoring loudly during a meeting.
  17. Quietly calling your boss's house when he's working overtime to tell his wife you saw him at the strip clubs, before realizing you accidentally called his cellphone.
  18. Reading dirty magazines during office hours
  19. sending a message to your boss which tells him that he is an idiot
  20. Telling your boss you slept with his wife.