A Wolf Among The Sheep

As his expression hardened, while it was painful, Luana knew that she had made the right decision. She didn't want to be the reason why Tate's and Tala's interaction turned sour throughout the day, they had already seen the beginnings of a tantrum because their daughter couldn't understand why they simply couldn't get along. After the two years she had forced daughter and father to be apart, she knew she had to give them their chances to be alone together. It would have been selfish of her to act on her wants to go out with the both of them. That bonded part of her crying out for her mate and their pup. However, Luana had to begin to accept it would never happen.

There was no point in allowing herself to hope and believe that there would ever be a second chance for her in this pack, or in Tate's heart. Leah clearly occupied that space now, and all she was good for was to be an object of hatred. She saw that now, and would have to accept it. The part of her that longed and hoped and dreamed, would have to be tied up and shoved in the metaphorical wardrobe. The love she still clung to for Tate, and the desire to have them back together as a family... it would have to be ignored, regardless of how much it was killing her to do so.

Even if he didn't hate her as much as he clearly did, how could she ever allow herself the chance to hurt him as badly as she had done? The fact he had attempted to take his own life, because of her, would haunt Luana for the rest of her life. How could she accept any form of decency from him going forward now, knowing what she knew? She didn't deserve anything from him, she definitely didn't deserve any love. From anyone.

Luana opened the door, but allowed him to step in first, keeping her eyes averted as he moved passed her. His scent, so strong with how close he was, had her choking back tears. The shirt she had worn on her last day in the pack had carried that scent for months, simply because she preserved it so well and refused to have it washed. But slowly it had faded away, just as her scent on his pillow had done for him.

All she wanted was to step up behind him and wrap her arms around him, only to press and nuzzle her face into the spot between his shoulders. The fingers on the hand that hung by her side twitched, the only sign of her inner turmoil as she turned her face to look back outside, breathing in and out heavily through her nose.

Instead of following him inside, Luana glanced back in to share a look with Ronan before stepping away from the door and allowing it to close behind her. The she-wolf remained outside, moving to the one side of the hut so neither Tate nor Tala would see her when they left. She couldn't allow either of them to see her in such a state of distress: butt pressed against the side of the hut, hands against knees and upper body bent over almost in line with her thighs as she attempt to control her breathing. Her nails dug into her knees slightly, the slight pain it caused allowing her not to lose herself completely.

Tala, meanwhile, looked away from where she was playing with her teddy, dug out of the bag by Ronan. It was a tattered looking thing, with an ear that had been stitched back on once already but was becoming frayed again. Luana had attempted to move her onto a newer cuddly toy, but Tala was obsessed, attached to the bear with no want to ever let it go.

"See dada's wolfie?" She repeated, immediately perking up, all thoughts of her tantrum and wanting her parents to be together forgotten, "Yes! Yes, yes, yes!" The toddler bounced on the floor to punctuate each verbal agreement, hands clapping together with giggles, "Swim with wolfie too? I-- I like swimming with da'wolfies." She told him, pushing herself to her feet with a big grin on her face. "Now? We go now?"
 
"Sure, we can swim with wolfie too, that sounds like it'll be fun, yeah? If that's what you wanna do, then that's what we'll do," confirmed Tate, having no qualms in letting Tala dictate their schedule. The day was primarily for her, so whatever she wanted to spend their time doing was what they were going to do. Hell, he wouldn't have enjoyed Luana's presence much given the emotional trauma that would have been brought up with it, but he would have stomached her appearance over the hours because Tala had desired it.

It was only Luana's rejection of the idea that had put a swift stop to it, even if it was what Tala wanted. Evidently, Luana had her reasons and the alpha reluctantly understood them - though he was easily distracted from dwelling on the rejection when his daughter signalled her eagerness and excitement for the day ahead of them, thankful that she too seemed distracted from thinking about her parents not being together as she felt they ought to be.

Without hesitation, he stood up with the little girl now safely in his arms, the mere act of actually, physically holding his daughter making him happier than he could have ever thought he would be. He would have grimaced at the idea of having a child a mere week ago, and now that act made him the happiest he'd ever been. He was stubborn, notoriously so, but he could admit that he had been devastatingly wrong about fatherhood: his fears remained but the love he held for Tala was undeniable, and all the motivation he needed to be the best father she could hope for.

Not needing to spend any further time with Luana (he wasn't sure either of them could handle another conversation right now), he nodded briefly to Ronan in silent gratitude before heading across the door - only to stop abruptly when it flung open before he could rest a hand on the doorknob. The sight of a clearly pissed off Anders did alert him a little, his mouth opening to question it, though he naturally assumed that he had things he needed to get off his chest with Luana and had decided to embark on that conversation now he was ready to.

After all, he was hardly going to assume that he had any business to deal with with Ronan.

"Luana's out back-- don't go yelling or anythin', alright? I get you're pissed off with her, we all are, but don't be an ass to her. Just... air your grievances as calmly as you can."

"...You've fucking changed your tune," the younger brother muttered in reply, forcing himself to stand upright even when Tate's presence had alerted him. He had been seconds away from furiously yelling at Ronan and exposing the bond they shared, managing to stop himself just in time - though such a close call understandably unnerved him, biting the inside of his cheek as hard as he dared to as Tate smiled gratefully and made his way out of the hut, whispering reassurances to his daughter along the way.

Only when the door had been safely shut behind them did Anders lift his gaze from the floor, his jaw clenched back together in the desperate attempt to calm the storm raging back within him at the sight of the other man.

"If you ever go near my daughter again, I'll make fucking sure I break your nose next time I punch 'ya. If she wandered in here, you walk out; you don't sit an' chat with her, you don't even look at her. You certainly d-don't fucking introduce yourself to her an' have her chatting excitedly about her new f-fucking friend, Ronan; what the hell's wrong with you? Do you think I'd-- I'd let you into her life? After you just abandoned us? You've got a screw loose, mate," he snapped, the harsh tone loud but a great deal more constrained than the outburst that had almost escaped him. His arms folded over his chest as he averted his gaze to the window, looking anywhere other than his mate.

"...J-Just... why are you here? Luana's got a reason to be here, for Tala - you ain't got any justification to be hangin' 'round here. Just fuck off back to your pack; ain't anyone here who likes you, let alone wants you here i-in our space."
 
Ronan sharply looked up at the chaos at the back door, his heart simultaneously dropping but also picking up in pace at the sight of his mate at the door. His very angry, very furious, mate. He instantly knew what had happened, that Teddy or Daisy had said something and that had caused him to come storming over to the hut in the fit of rage he currently possessed. His eyes nervously darted to Tate, who, thankfully, seemed none the wiser to the fact that Anders' emotion was actually directed towards the person inside the hut, rather than outside it.

He slowly stood as the threats and harsh words rained down on him, moving away from the bed to stand in the centre of the hut. Both to show Anders that he had his full attention, as he always would, but also so he wasn't actually near any objects that he could hit his head on in case his mate did decide to resort to physical violence like before.

"What'd'ya expect me to do, Anders? She started talkin' to me. I'm not goin' ignore her an' just walk passed her." He answered back, arms folding across his chest as he watched the other man carefully, cautious for any behaviours that would suggest he was about to make a potential violent move.

He exhaled heavily and shook his head, "No, I didn't expect that, actually. I didn't need your punch to know I wasn't goin' to be welcomed here. The way you all reacted to Lu was enough." He kept his eyes on his mate, arms unfolding for his hands to push deep into his pockets, "You know I didn't abandon you, Anders. You might not want to admit it, but you know deep down I didn't abandon you on purpose." The sandy-blonde male took a hesitant step forward, stopping soon afterwards.

"I think we both know why I've come back, Anders." He added then quietly, eyes steady on the other male. His hands came out of his pockets, raising slightly in an act of surrender, "I... I promised myself I'd keep away from you, from Teddy, just like I knew you clearly wanted after yesterday's reaction but... but I couldn't. Seeing you, seeing her... talking to her... I could see so much of her in you. She's a hell of'a talker, babblin' on... just like someone else I know." He smiled a little, hands fidgeting as he pulled on fingers, some knuckles cracking as a result.

Ronan knew he had to push past the harsh words from his mate, ignore the hurt and pain that they caused. It was only reflective, and a small slither of the pain his mate had felt as his disappearance for the past two years, "I... I didn't come back earlier because I was scared. I admit it, alrigh'? The fact we were still hidin' things before shit hit the fan two years ago... I didn't have a reason to come back earlier, in the eyes of your pack anyways. Anders I... I wanted to come back, so badly. I-- I missed you, an' Teddy... so much. But I didn't want to risk... I wasn't sure if you felt ready... if we were ready..." He began to struggle with his words, "Lu was my way in, I could be her escort back an'... an' my way to stick around. To be back with you an' Teddy."

He hesitated, and eventually took another small step closer, "Anders I'm... I'm here for you. For Teddy. I... I'm here to say I'm sorry. An' I... I know that means fuck all to ya but I..." He averted his gaze, taking in a long breath, composing himself before looking back up, "I... I can't say I'll be goin' anywhere. Even if-- Even if it means staying on the fuckin' boundary of your pack. I-- I ain't leavin' you again. Or Teddy."
 
"Shut up-- you don't g-get to stand there and-- and talk about her like she means anythin' to 'ya, like you're a part of her life 'cos-- you ain't, so quit t-talking about how she is and how she reminds you of me an'-- an' all of that 'cos it ain't fair to her or me for you to waltz in an' act like... you can just fill a gap that she isn't even aware exists. She doesn't know who the fuck you are, Ronan," he snapped back in return, though unlike the seething anger of the day prior when he had stormed over to his mate with the confidence needed to land a punch to his face, he wasn't even capable of stringing together a sentence without stumbling over his words and acknowledging the breaks in his voice.

His throat felt tight which caused the latter, the realisation that he was growing emotional during one of the moments in his life he so desperately wanted to remain cool, calm and collected in making him grimace to himself in a mixture of disgust and annoyance because, much like Tate with Luana, he didn't think his mate ought to see him in such a state. Not because he wanted to spare him the emotional repercussions of seeing him hurt, but because he didn't get to witness the vulnerability and fragility anymore; not after he had left for two years without a word on his whereabouts or safety.

Even if Anders was far more emotional than his eldest brother was and thereby most in the pack had seen him tearful over something or other, this was one moment where he desperately wanted to hold himself together just so the fact that he didn't want Ronan in his life anymore was sternly made.

A bitter laugh and the disbelief that accompanied it did distract him from the emotions building within him, focusing everything he had on the former to avoid the latter. He cast a quick glance at the backdoor to ensure Luana wasn't about to trail in and disrupt the conversation, Anders not being sure he could maintain his level of calm (however weak it was) if she did. He had grievances with her disappearance too, having lost a best friend for two years as well as his own mate. He could only deal with one of those grievances at the moment; dealing with them both at the same time would only tip him over the edge.

"You ain't leavin'? You're stickin' 'round for me and Teddy? What do 'ya want, Ronan? A fucking medal?" He snorted again as he pushed his broad shoulders back in the continued effort of maintaining some control of himself. He wasn't a violent person so the rage he felt within him that urged him to lash out violently horrified him... and he wanted to prove to himself that he wasn't that person; that he could fight back such temptations and act in a way that was morally justifiable. Violence never really was that, in his eyes, which was why he regretted the punch he had thrown.

Even if he disliked the man right now, violence was never the answer and he would have apologised for it by now if he wasn't as infuriated with him for interacting with Teddy without being made aware of it until it was over and done with.

"...What is it you want me to say exactly? That I love 'ya and we can give this a go and be a nice little family? Do you not realise how fucking... absurd that is? Even if I loved you, we ain't ever going to have that family dynamic," he reminded under his breath, forcing his jaw to unwind and relax when the amount of pressure he had placed on it by clenching it so hard caused him to grimace.

"Y-You... should have told me what was happening; we coulda worked something out. I could have... built up the courage to do something about us, tell people. I ain't-- risking anything for you now. I can't trust 'ya. Like hell am I gonna come out for you. What if you fuck off again? I'm left here a-all fucking alone, again, an' dealing with everyone... judgin' me. N-Nah, I... I ain't doing that for you. What we have, it ain't-- it's nothing. We don't have anything anymore, you got that? S-So find a girl, settle down, have kids - act like you're into that. It's what I'm gonna do."
 
"I know she don't. S'why I didn't introduce myself as anythin' of importance to her Anders-- fuck's sake, don't you think I knew how wound up you were goin' to get? That I knew you'd be like this?" Ronan gestured to his mate with one hand while the other rubbed at the back of his head, exhaling heavily.

He knew he had said to Daisy that he would keep away from both Anders and Teddy if that was what the other man truly wanted. But he needed to make his emotions known first. He wasn't like Luana where he could simply bottle up those emotions and hide them away as best as she could. He also wasn't in the same situation as his friend. His mate hadn't moved on yet, and with Anders stood in front of him, even if it was just to hurl abuse at him, Ronan wasn't about to let the moment to tell his mate what he wanted slip away.

Ronan let the other rant for as long as he needed, a flurry of emotion crossing his expression with each word and stance that was taken. Hurt, pain, frustration, back to hurt. The fact that his mate had said that they had nothing between them was a bitter pill to swallow, especially when Ronan knew he still held a firm and immovable love in his heart for Anders. It was hard to acknowledge that his mate truly felt that way, and the male cleared his throat, averting his gaze finally.

However, instead of allowing the conversation to come to a close and accepting what had been said, he reluctantly lifted his head and his eyes once more. They settled onto Anders, roaming his features and his body.

"You were left alone because you let me leave, Anders. Just-- just like Tate, you stood by an' did nothing as we left." Ronan said softly, a contradiction to the harsh words that escape his own mouth, "Yes, I left for two years. Yes, I should have said or done something. Yes, I should have come back earlier. But you can't pretend to be all innocent and the victim in all this." He took a few steps forward, his hands coming out of his pockets to fold across his chest, "If you hadn't let me go-- if you'd said something, I'd've known... I'd've known you were ready to tell your family. To be with me."

He continued his few steps closer, nearing his mate, but he kept himself alert, ready for another physical lash-out from the male in front of him. "But y'know what, fuck that if I'm about to let it happen a second time. The idea of you being with someone else, even if we both know you won't feel any attraction to her-- I can't let that happen. You're my mate. And I love you still. I don't care if you don't give a shit. But I ain't about to do what Luana's willin' to do an' watch my mate move on, not without fightin' for them first."
 
The refusal to back down and just slip away without a fight (one of words rather than physical) inevitably annoyed Anders, whose countenance darkened considerably the more Ronan stood before him, fighting his case. It only grew stormier when he physically began to close the distance between them, a fact that the younger werewolf visibly resented. He stood his ground rather than back away from him in the desire to remain as strong as he could - cowering back from him would hardly help achieve that.

He had always been categorised as the 'weak' one out of his siblings, more so than even Daisy who might have been doubted for her physical strength but had always been praised for her emotional maturity. In contrast, Anders didn't even have that to call upon in the eyes of the siblings (and the pack) who knew he was sensitive and less confident than they all were, and he had always felt like that was held against him as evidence of his lack of strength, as if the two at all correlated.

He had worked hard to battle against that impression, both physically by working hard and throwing himself into training alongside Gio as well as mentally by standing up for himself rather than backing down; believing in his own capabilities rather than shrug and think pessimistically of himself. He was by no means a finished article of the latter, knowing he still had a long way to go to counter the insecurities, but he was proud of the progress he had made thus far - so backing away from Ronan and bowing to the slight guilt he felt rising in him wasn't a possibility he was willing to embark on.

Though the emotional turmoil he already felt embroiled in and the other's decision to keep venturing forward closer to him resulted in that lashing out that Ronan had predicted, albeit not necessarily an outburst of violence like that of the previous day. Instead, he gave Ronan a shove backwards and, apparently unsatisfied with the results, stepped forward to grab him by the collar of his shirt and push him the rest of the way back until he met the wall.

"What you're gonna do is s-shut the fuck up, alrigh'? 'Cos I gave you an answer; I said we ain't got anything, that I ain't fighting for this 'cos it ain't... worth it, not without trust. And I don't fuckin' trust 'ya, Ro," he hissed as fiercely as he allowed himself to be. The statement ought to have been a parting word, for there was nothing he could say any more clearly than that. He intended for it to be the last thing he said, in fact, but the moment where he had decided to storm out again had come and passed, leaving him stood where he was without any physical indication of trying to make an exit.

In fact, his hands remained gripping Ronan's shirt rather than return to his sides in that expectation to leave. For a few seconds, he remained frozen in that moment, unsure what it was he was even doing - but he acted before his thoughts had a chance to catch up to him, the innate part of him that held so much love for his mate deciding to leap ahead and put those inner feelings into action. And so, once those few seconds of inactivity passed by, more time was then dedicated to crushing his lips against his mate's and tugging him as close as he possibly could.

He had desired to hold him and kiss him even before the two year absence, only to realise that they couldn't openly express their love for one another. Not once had they really had a moment like this and even with all the spiteful words of hatred being thrown at Ronan just seconds before, Anders couldn't deny himself the chance to just... hold his mate; make the most of the first real physical expression of the love he had always held for him.

Such was the passion behind the kiss that Anders pulled back from it breathlessly, the faintest of smiles resting on his lips as he reluctantly pulled his forehead back from Ronan's, taking a second to at least gather a little composure.

"...You're a good kisser," he remarked quietly as he bit his own lip in a sudden moment of bashfulness, his smile widening a tad. "I, u-uh... I love you, y'know so... so don't... don't you dare fuckin' disappear on me again, Ro. I can't go through that shit again."
 
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Despite his best intentions to keep himself aware of any sudden movement from Anders, Ronan still didn't see the shove coming. Nor the shirt grab after that. His back was against the wall before he could do anything about it, and it left him slightly shocked by his mate's sudden show of strength. He hadn't yet before experienced Anders' physical side in such a way, of course the punch being the opener to it. And considering he had only seen the softer, kinder side to the other man, he hadn't ever expected such power to reside within his mate.

His breathing hitched, and then quickened slightly at the close proximity. The lack of space between them had that innate part of Ronan howling, longing to do something with the closeness they now had. It was the closest they had been even before the two year period, with the male feeling the warmth radiating from his mate.

While the action started off with violent intent, Ronan was vaguely aware of just how that tension was dissipating. He could sense it in the air, that the moment for Anders to leave after the comment he finished with was beginning to fade.

His eyes ran over his mate, the only thing that moved as he didn't dare to speak or lift an arm to try and remove his mate's hands from his shirt. And he was so glad that he refrained from responding.

Feeling Anders' lips against his was certainly a shock. Ronan even froze, going deadly still for a second as he wondered if it was really happening. But upon feeling his mate's lips move against his, he immediately sank into it. His hands moved up into Anders' hair, tangling there to encourage the tightness in which they were pressed. They had been denied the opportunity two years ago, to be like this. Ronan would be damned if he gave up the opportunity now.

When the moment ended, and it was over far too quickly for Ronan's liking, he swallowed back a breath and allowed his hands to fall from Anders' hair. At the sight of the smile, Ronan crumbled and tears finally swelled in his eyes in the relief of his mate finally letting him in.

He stepped forward so he was away from the wall, and raised his hands up to cup his mate's cheeks. This time he was the one to place a soft, sweet kiss to his lips, pulling back with a faint smile of his own, "I ain't goin' anywhere, don't you worry. I promise, you're stuck with me now for the long haul."
 
"I'm still mad at 'ya for not sending any word for two entire years, but... I get it. I... didn't really make an effort to stop you goin', did I? I just stood there an' let it happen so... I... guess we were both being idiots," he suggested after a moment of recollecting himself. He wanted nothing more than to just move past all of the tension and anger by being intimate with his mate, connecting with him not just for the first time in two whole years but possibly for the first time ever. He knew Ronan was his mate and they had shared secret moments of minimal affection but nothing akin to what most mates were capable of enjoying together on a readily basis.

This was one moment where they had actually embarked on a little affection and once that step had been taken, Anders admittedly found it horrendously difficult to ignore the part of him that just wanted to take in as much of it as he could; to lock the door to the hut and enjoy being with his mate as they were more than entitled to.

But he also knew that Luana was just outside and would be returning into the hut at any moment - and he wouldn't put her in a position where she had to either wait outside alone or head into the pack who still resented her. He was still hurting, still angered by her absence, but the stubbornness that had been presented by him thus far had been broken the moment his lips met with his mate's - he could acknowledge his hurt without invalidating the experiences that his best friend and his mate had undergone; ones that had prevented them from returning until now. Mistakes had still been made in that time but it was exhausting holding onto so much anger when he... loved them both dearly and cared for them more than they could possibly know.

Just the thought of letting that go and trying to move on from it was already freeing up the heavy weight that had resided on his chest for much of the two years.

"I... would give you another kiss but I'm not sure I'd be able to just stop at that, and it'd be unfair for Lu to stay out there listenin' in on us. I ain't gonna put her through that-- plus I'd be fuckin' mortified," he offered with a playful grin, the teasing between them being a stark contrast from the words of hurt and fury that had dominated just minutes ago - but this was his mate. It was easy to fall back into playful conversations as though he hadn't just been at his throat, furious with him.

It would take a while to really recover from the two years of hurt, of course, but the difference now was that he was prepared to recover with Ronan at his side, rather than force him away and neglect tackling their issues head on. He actively wanted to work on what they had; be that family he had always dreamt of being.

Throwing it all away because of his own stubbornness would be the worst decision he would have ever made.

"I... I'm sorry. For punching 'ya. For being an asshole. For... not defending what we had to my pack; for lettin' you just leave w-without fightin' for us. I'm real sorry, Ro. I just... I was scared. An' when I saw you yesterday, I was so fuckin' angry an' I... reacted in a way I-- I really regret," he continued with a quiet glance to the other's nose, their enhanced healing abilities meaning that it had more or less healed up already but that didn't stop Anders from frowning guiltily in remembrance of the blood and bruises that had covered it a day prior.

"I've been trainin' with Gio, he taught me a few things, but you should never have been on the opposite end of it. I-- I regretted it the moment it happened. I guess tha' doesn't help 'cos you still had a bloody nose but... I'll make it up to 'ya, promise."
 
"S'long as we can move past this part in our lives together. I don't ever want us to be like that again, I mean it. I'm goin' do everythin' I can now, goin' forward, to make sure we never end up in a situation like that again." Ronan vowed, allowing his hands to drop from his mate's face. It was such a relief, to no longer feel the waves of hatred rolling from Anders. While it did amaze him just how quickly his mate from detesting him to confessing his love, Ronan wasn't about to argue or question it. He was going to take it with both hands and run.

Ronan then laughed, his own cheeks warming at the prospect of things going further like Anders suggested. He would have loved to have continued that sweet, private moment with his mate, but the reminder that Luana was somewhere outside was enough to have him clawing back his self-control.

"Me neither. I ain't that keen to have an audience," he agreed, but his allowed his eyes to wander over Anders' body briefly, as if considering what it would be like to finally have his mate in every way, "I guess I'll just have to be patient... though I'm not sure how much more patient I can be after a kiss like that. I enjoyed you taking control." He winked, grinning back just as easily as Anders teased him in the first place.

It was as if he had never left. It felt that way, with the light, if slightly sensual and sexual banter. The previous, negative emotions directed towards him were pretty much forgotten. They had both gotten what they needed to off their chests... and now they were prepared to draw a line under the past two years and attempt to move on, together.

The young man stepped forward, brow furrowing in response to Anders' apology and he reached out to cup the other's cheek again, "Hey, s'alright. I deserved it an' I'm... glad you got it off your chest. Clearly there was... a lot goin' on an' I... I definitely deserved it."

He pressed his lips to his mate's forehead, exhaling heavily as he pulled the other into his chest, just to simply hold his mate, "Well he's taught you well, you throw one hell ofa fuckin' punch." Ronan laughed, shaking his head in amusement, "Nah, don't be startin' that now. Let's just call it evens, alrigh'? No makin' it up to anyone. Let's... let's just start fresh, yeah?"
 
All the maturity and growth in the world wouldn't overhaul Anders' tendency to grow shy nor dim the propensity for bashfulness. He had worked on his self-esteem and ability to stand up for himself (for his daughter as much as for him) but at his core, he was always going to be the person who had no qualms in showing his emotions and sensitivities.

He had worked on his confidence, as evident by the fact he had been the one to initiate the kiss in all its undeniable passion, but the teasing from Ronan in response to it caused a more characteristic blush of bashfulness cross his cheeks, the colour intensifying the more his mind pondered what the two would be doing if it weren't for Luana stood just outside the hut.

He had been the one to broach such a topic and allude to the desire he held for Ronan, but his timorousness kicked in the moment the other continued to reference it. Though it didn't stop a smile from pulling at his lips at the flirtation in the air - as shy as he was in response to it, he had encouraged its blossoming eagerly.

After two years without Ronan at his side, engaging in the playful conversation with all its suggestiveness was to be expected, and it took every ounce of strength he had no to go in for another kiss precisely because he knew their unsubtle remarks to one another would only become reality - and they had already made an agreement not to tempt one another into anything when now wasn't the right time.

"Fresh start. Right. I got that," he agreed after a moment of collecting himself, his hands having covered his cheeks in the hope that he would somehow cool down the raging blush hidden behind them though gave up on the futile attempt when the warmth generated refused to die down. Reluctantly sporting the crimson blush, he attempted to appear as casual as he could by leaning back against the wall and subtly letting his eyes drift up and down Ronan, only now being able to appreciate just how deeply he had missed his company now the anger had lessened in intensity.

"I... did tell Teddy about 'ya, when she was little. I... guess she forgot, an' I was too stubborn to remind 'er, but... we can do that, together. Tell 'er who you are 'cos I... obviously you're her Dad, Ronan. I ain't... I ain't ever saw you as anythin' other than her father, we wanted that, right? Raising her together? An'... she's a handful so I kinda need you on board; I dunno where she gets all her energy from," he remarked playfully in regards to their daughter, biting his bottom lip hard at the sudden emotion that rose in his chest at the thought of having his family together for the first time; at sitting Teddy down and informing her that she was fortunate enough to have another parent in her life who was going to love her just as much as Anders did.

"She-- She likes 'ya. She was babbling about you when Daisy brought her to the hut, said she'd met a real adventurer who'd journeyed through the woods an' over rivers an' all tha'. I'm just-- I'm glad you're back. You and Lu," he clarified, the reminder of his best friend causing his eyes to peer across at the back door. The pain remained at their absences but the breakthrough he had made with Ronan allowed him to consider Luana not as this evil figure who had purposely put them through two years of pain, but his best friend who had to make a decision for her daughter's sake regardless of the consequences.

In her position, he would have done the same thing; he was a parent and he knew that he would protect Teddy at all costs, no matter what. The fact he hadn't considered her case through that lens until now made him furious with himself but at least he had come to the realisation relatively quickly, rather than spend an untold amount of weeks continuing to despise her for a decision she had made as a parent.

"I... should go an' talk to her, right? I just-- I fuckin' know I'll end up cryin' an' then she'll cry and we'll both be embarrassed a-and... and what if she doesn't want to talk to me, Ro? What if she... she hates me after yesterday, the way I reacted to her?"
 
Ronan's smile turned from one that was playful, to one of soft seriousness. He allowed his mate to pull back from the hold he had originally had him in, but kept his hand clasped to the back of the other's neck. His thumb gently stroked the side of Anders' neck, eyes running over him, "I'm on board. I'm so on board it ain't even funny." He reassured with a small chuckle, nodding to confirm his words, "Like I said, I ain't goin' anywhere now, Anders. Not now... not now we're okay."

The thought of letting Luana head back to the pack alone with Tala didn't sit right with him, so considered that maybe it would be best that he did escort them back but return the next day. However he didn't ever want Anders to ever feel the way he had done again. He didn't ever want his mate worrying and questioning if he was going to return. But this was a problem for a little later down the line, and something that didn't need to be considered in that moment. They could discuss that as a group later, and come up with a solution, together.

He laughed again at what he was next told about Teddy, grinning warmly at the little girl's antics, "She's definitely a character," he commented, reluctantly taking his hand away from his mate to shove into his trouser pockets again, "You've... you've done so well with her, Anders." He then murmured sincerely, grin melting into a smile, "I... I'm always goin'ta be sorry that I missed all the start of it. But I'm... I'm so proud of what you've done. Of the both of you. An' I... I'll never be able to stop sayin' I'm sorry."

Ronan's smile then briefly faded as Anders started talking about Luana, a brief surge of guilt filling him as he suddenly remembered their friend sat outside. He had experienced such an elation at making up with his own mate, that he had completely forgotten and disregarded his friend's own turmoil.

"She... she ain't goin' hate you, Anders. She missed you, a fuckin' lot. All of you... I don't think she could hate you if she tried." He replied finally, eyes darting to the back door before returning to his mate, "To... to be honest, Anders... Daisy... she told us everythin'. What happened with Tate, that is. Like how she...found him..." His gaze dropped, finding it difficult to think about since he had to wonder what Anders would have been like if Teddy hadn't been there.

Taking in a deep breath, he lifted his eyes to continue, "We know what he tried to do an'... an' Lu... well, I ain't spoken to her since 'cause she went running because it all got too much. Then Tate turned up an' then you did. But she... she didn't take it well. Daisy tried to convince her it wa'n't her fault but..." He shook his head, glancing to the door again.

"She ain't okay, Anders. She really ain't. She was anxious before, but at least she had hope. But with how your pack reacted, an' her seein' Tate with Leah, an' then your family seein' her off... then to find out Tate almost... She really ain't okay, despite what she tries to say. Her-- habit's back. I saw it. It-- It ain't good. So-- so I think she could use a friend right now. I think... knowin' you were both okay... I think that'll do her some good."
 
He hadn't wanted to drift off the topic of Teddy when sharing moments from his daughter's life that Ronan had missed. He wanted to inform him of every one of those milestones she had passed because he hadn't been present for them; not to make him feel guilty for his absence but because he had a right to know how the little girl had been for the past two years. He was as much her father as Anders was, so it was only natural to gush about Teddy to him; allow him to put together those images in his mind. They wouldn't compare to memories, of course, but it was better than an empty void.

Besides, they had the rest of their lives to dedicate to making memories with Teddy. She was only three, not yet out of her toddler years, so while Ronan had missed her first step and first word, there were countless other opportunities ahead of them to experience with her together. Focusing on what he had missed when they could instead be optimistic over the long future they had together was a waste of time; Anders saw that now.

But he couldn't presently dwell on their daughter when Luana was present in his mind - and characteristically, Anders' anxiety was getting the best of him. The likelihood of Luana ever harbouring hatred for him as he had come to genuinely fear was slim, if nigh-on impossible, but he couldn't help but plague himself with that possibility, as if his behaviour last night had soured the best friendship he had ever possessed.

Because before Luana, Anders hadn't had a real, true friendship outside of his bonds with his siblings. His tendency to withdraw from situations that overwhelmed him meant that he had gone 18 years of his life without a friend at his side. His pack cared and loved him, he knew that, but there was a difference between that and a person he could confide in; a friend he could be himself around without concern over judgement from them.

Luana had been that person. He had been the first to approach her when she was unceremoniously dragged into their pack; the first one to really engage with her like she was an equal and not a figure to sneer in disgust, or stare rudely in confusion, at. Their friendship had gone from strength to strength after that day, so the idea that she could possess any negative feelings towards him hurt.

But that feeling subsequently made him realise her position; how badly she must have hurt when Anders had reacted to her with such venom.

He needed the reassurance from Ronan, actively seeking it - but what he hadn't anticipated was the truth behind Luana's sudden emotional distress. The moment Ronan let the truth leave his lips, Anders' blush disappeared all at once, all colour draining from his face as he was transported immediately back to the day Daisy ran into the pack, sobbing frantically about their eldest brother and what he had attempted (and fortunately failed) to do.

"She... she knows? O-Oh my god," he breathed heavily as he reached to hold onto his own hair in the effort to keep himself together. He knew he would be hysterical if he heard that Ronan had attempted something of a similar nature, the mere thought making him feel violently ill... so Luana having to live with the reality that Tate had physically tried to end his life and undoubtedly blaming herself for it-- it made Anders tear up, even though he pressed his fists to his eyes to hide the glassiness behind them.

He took in a few shaky breaths before silently heading across to the back door, hesitating over the handle until he had gathered some sense of composure - though it inevitably disappeared when he opened the door and set his eyes on his best friend, tears filling his eyes all over again. Without a word, he bent down to her level and took her into his arms, incapable of saying anything for several, long seconds.

Eventually, he would speak, leaning back a little to get a look at her: "Lu, you and I are okay, a'ight? J-Just-- we're cool, I... you're my best friend, I-- I love 'ya."
 
Luana's body tensed at the sound of the back door opening, hand stilling where it had inevitably fallen against her forearm again to begin pinching and dragging nails against skin. She attempted to subtly hide the hand that had been committing the acts of harm, not wanting to receive another lecture from Ronan. She knew it wouldn't be Tate, since the other had long since set off with their daughter.

However her shoulders hunched further at Anders' familiar scent, head turning away from where he was approaching from at first. She didn't need a barrage of abuse from her former friend at that point, something she had instantly expected she was going to get given how things were last left between them. But she bit her tongue, refusing to allow the broken comment from escaping. Besides, she would have deserved it. To Luana, all she deserved was the pain that she had seemed to provide them with, even if she had done so unknowingly.

It was why she didn't even attempt to curb her habit. Because the pain her actions caused was something she felt she had to go through. It was a punishment she felt she had to deal with, and even then it wasn't enough. She deserved a lot worse.

However, it wasn't a barrage of words she found herself faced with, but instead she felt his arms wrap around her. Her chest tightened and her breath caught in her throat, brow furrowing at the act of affection. But soon the frown melted away, and her body began to tremble with the effort to keep herself together.

Soon Luana couldn't keep it in anymore, the shaking becoming worse as she finally released the sobs she had been fighting to hide. Her arms came up to wrap firmly around Anders, pulling him back to her after his confirmation that they were okay. Some things never changed, and Luana was still incapable if hiding her true emotions around Anders, collapsing into a pool of tears the moment she heard that she was still his best friend.

It got to a point where Luana was basically clinging to her old friend, face buried into the side of his face as she sobbed.

"I'm so-rry. I'm so sorry, Anders." She hiccuped, not pulling back just yet, "I didn't know. I had no idea-- things were this bad. I-- I just had to focus-- focus on Tala. B-but I know that-- that ain't an excuse. I-I-- I'm so sorry."
 
"...You had a kid, Lu. I was a... let's be honest, yeah? I was a dickhead for not hearing 'ya out 'cos... I get it, I really do. You did what you had to do for her, I'd have done the same for Teddy. You-- made mistakes in keeping us in the dark about it but-- I get the reasoning behind it. Do I wish you coulda told us? Sure, but... I get it," he repeated after a few moments of needed silence, more than happy to refrain from talking when she clung onto him. For those moments, just holding her and supporting her as she broke down into the heavy sobs was all he needed to do, and all he wanted to do.

Too many times, Luana had been the one to comfort him and ease him of his concerns. That was just part of being a best friend and he knew that she would rush to have his back no matter how many times she had to do it, but the scales were heavily weighted in his favour when it came to who received the most support. Luana had always tended to put on a brave face to mask her feelings when out around the pack, but that wasn't an excuse he could fall back upon - he knew he hadn't been there for her as much as he perhaps should have been two years ago.

They were best friends and behind the scenes, away from prying eyes, he knew he could have done better to be there for her. But at least he had an opportunity to do so now, right when she probably needed his reassurances the most.

"Hey, it ain't your fault, you hear me? Don't you dare go blamin' yourself - now I know you're gonna ignore me and take the blame but I mean it, Lu; it really isn't your fault. So don't go holding onto all this, how are you ever gonna move on with Tate an' co-parent if you can't even look him in the eye without... gettin' like this? You gotta just... talk with him when you feel up to it. Doesn't have to be soon, but it can't be this huge secret between you guys. I reckon we've all had enough of hiding secrets, hm?" He smiled softly in reference to Tala and the entire situation that had kept her a secret for two years; the entirety of her life until just yesterday was something Tate and the pack had been oblivious to.

And so, however hard it was to face the truth of what had happened in the two years apart, the only option was to face it head on and get everything out in the open - or the guilt would consume her and the possibility of co-parenting for Tala's sake disappeared.

"...Like I said, you ain't even gotta think about talking with 'im today; just come back into the hut, have some tea an'... we can talk. About nice stuff. You can tell me all about Tala 'cos I ain't seen much of her yet but I want to. I-- I wish I was there with 'ya, Lu. Helping you through it an' all that, and I wish you were here to see Teddy but-- they're young, right? We got plenty of time to spend together an' make all sorts of memories. That's what I was telling Ronan, anyway: in the grand scheme of things, two years-- it ain't a lot to miss out on."
 
Luana sniffed and wiped at eyes and nose, keeping her eyes averted as she tried to compose herself once more. She didn't once think about hiding anything more from him once she felt his arms around her and his declaration of loving her, only in a friendly way. His words, as simple as they were, reassured her that they were okay. That they were on a track to forgiveness and being as they were once more.

But just as she had done with Daisy, Luana simply couldn't accept that none of this was her fault. How could she, after the reaction she had received and with what she had learned?

"He... He tried to kill himself. Because I left. Because I didn't write. How can I ever look him in the eye again knowing I made my mate feel that way, Anders?" She pulled the sleeves of her shirt down as far as her fingers to trap them hem there. Both as an act of anxious fidgeting, but also to hide the broken or breaking skin of her arms. "I-- I made him feel that way. I made my mate feel that... That low that he felt that was the only option. An'--an' now he hates me. An' is happy with someone else. "

Her hand raised to wipe some of her sleeve against her cheek, taking in a deep breath as she moved to sit on the steps that led up to the back door. She turned her gaze down to her hands after, pulling at the edges of her sleeves as she fidgeted, "I-- I can't-- he hates me enough already. I can't talk to him about that. You know what he's like, he'll hate that I know." She swallowed thickly.

"I tried... So hard while I was away. Trainin', pushin' myself until I was sick... Or somethin' had broken. I-- I just wanted to be the mate I felt he deserved an'-- an' The alpha you all needed. B-but then I found out I was pregnant an'... An' I was scared. I didn't want him to look at me an'... Send me packing again. Like he did." She expelled a harsh breath, arm covering her eyes before it lowered to place her hand in her lap.

Hesitantly, her gaze raised to find Anders, taking a moment to study her old friend. She smiled weakly, arms wrapping around herself, "So, you an' Ronan are good now too then?" She changed the subject, falling back into her habit of not wanting to whine too much. It wasn't far, she felt, that he had all that pain from two years and he had to listen to her misery.

She didn't deserve to unload it onto anyone. Much less anyone she had hurt.
 
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"You really gonna keep holding onto guilt you shouldn't feel? Lu, it-- wasn't your fault, I'll keep telling 'ya that until the day I die. Anything coulda had an impact on him that very day - Leah had had an argument with him, Lyle an' Chester ignored him when he wanted to chat with 'em and told him he wasn't that important, I... didn't go out hunting with 'im so he could 'ave felt alone 'cos of that; 'cos of all of it. D'ya see what I'm getting at? It... might be a combination of everythin', but at the end of the day, he... he chose to take the decision; it was him, Lu. Not you, not me, not nobody. Don't... keep doin' this to yourself, it ain't good to hold onto this heaviness."

He came to a stop after the most recent bout of reassurances, letting the words sink in. Even if they fell on deaf ears once again, he, like Daisy, wasn't going to just give up because she wasn't hearing them - or accepting what they were saying to her. He would do his all to support her regardless of the circumstance, but especially in this one when the amount of guilt she was piling onto herself wasn't just misplaced; it was entirely unfair and would just prove a detriment to her own health if she continued to believe so strongly that she was to blame.

It wasn't the case, and he would repeat himself every day if he truly had to. Whether the message sunk through or not, he was always going to maintain that she had no reason to feel guilty over what Tate had felt he had to do that day - because she had absolutely no reason to torture herself. He could understand the news hurting her to her core and regretting her absence, but to blame herself for the act? He wasn't going to allow her to continue thinking that everyone else believed it to be the case when it, quite simply, wasn't.

...Although he was relieved when the conversation turned to something that was much less (negatively) emotionally charged, the blush rising back to his cheeks at the reference to his relationship with Ronan. He hadn't had anyone to talk to about the absence of his mate, too afraid of turning to even members of his own family in fear of rejection or confusion: even Daisy was left oblivious (until today, at least) because of that concern.

To be able to speak honestly and openly with someone about his mate and feel no judgement from them about it, but rather support and love... it meant the world to him and if he hadn't already shed so many tears, he would have become choked up over it.

"I... yeah, we're good. I can't hold a grudge, I ain't capable of it. 'Specially not when it comes to you guys. I love you both, you know? An'-- I couldn't stay mad at Ro when he was supportin' you through your stuff, Lu. I was hurt, but... that's my mate, y'know? I love him," he shrugged bashfully as he peered at the door of the hut, smiling to himself in realisation that his mate was just a few feet away on the other side of it.

"Besides, I couldn't be angry when he's gotten so cute; kinda hard to be mad at a guy that looks as good as he does-- is that cheesy? Don't-- tell him I said that, he'll just get all cocky about it~"
 
"But I... I should have been there for him, Anders. If I hadn't gone, or at least-- at least come back earlier... he wouldn't have been with Leah. He might have come to talk to me instead of Lyle or Chester. An'-- an' regardless of all that, I'm-- I was his mate. I should've been here for him to... to talk to... to support him." They might have moved on, but she couldn't let the topic go. Not when she felt as strongly as she did about the whole situation.

It had opened up a whole new path of fear for Luana, who now worried frantically that the same would happen with Tala. She had so clearly failed her mate; what if she failed her daughter too?

"Besides, that's not what the majority sees, issit? An' how-- I don't know how I'm goin' to be able to... it hurts, Anders. It hurt so much to see him with... with... with Leah. Bu-but he's happy, ain't he? I-- I can't ruin that for him. I... ain't about to go talkin' to him an' gettin' everyhin' off my chest when he's so clearly happy again. I ain't... ruinin' that. He's my mate, even if he don't see me that way anymore. I-- love him, but I gotta... gotta let that go if he's happy with her."

The words stabbed at her heart, tearing another whole through her soul which left another emptiness that she couldn't see being filled. Ronan and Tala, and the acceptance by Daisy, Sasha and now Anders had all filled in the gaps that had already been created. But Luana wasn't sure she would ever feel complete again so long as Tate continued to hate her.

She brought her knees up to her chest, arms wrapping around her lower legs as her cheek rested on the top of her knees. Her eyes remained on Anders, the faint smile reappearing as she listened.

Her hand reached out to rest on his knee, squeezing it gently with a slightly warmer smile than before, "I'm glad you've both worked thin's out-- really, I mean it. He-- he really has missed you, y'know. He was such a good friend to me, while we were away. You're both-- perfect for each other, y'know that?"

Luana body scooted across on the stair to lean against him, head quietly resting on his shoulder. Her arm slipped through his to link up, taking a deep breath of this familiar and comforting scent which almost set her off again.

"Don't worry," she then chuckled weakly, "Your secret is safe with me." She pulled her head back to look up at him, hesitating, "So-- are you... are you goin' to tell... people now? We know what secrets can do... you said so yourself, we've all had enough of 'em."
 
"I... I want to tell everyone, you know? If I'd told them all two years ago, Ronan might have come back and visited, because everyone would get that he had a reason to be here - an' I want 'em to know that. Know he's not just some random guy that's got no justification for being here. It's just-- it ain't easy to admit it to 'em, Lu. It was hard tellin' you an' you're my best friend; imagine how fucking terrifying it is to contemplate telling people I know won't react the way you did? I... I've tried to learn how to stand up for myself but it still fucking scares me," he admitted with a faint shrug. He knew the difference between their problems in that his own was in his hands; he could have everything he wanted if he just came out and admitted to the pack who Ronan was and why he mattered so much.

What he desired was solely reliant on him having to find the confidence to come out with the news, whereas Luana's issues with her own mate were in a far more complex state. There were more issues between her and Tate that couldn't just be resolved by her admitting her wrongs: she had done so and still the pain, hurt and anger remained.

And even if Tate completely forgave her and they were able to move on, the fact he had romantically moved on with Leah was yet another complication. Admittedly, as dearly as he cared for Leah as a friend and for everything she had done to help Tate, Anders couldn't deny that he wanted Luana to return to Tate's side and for the two to reconnect and get back together, and hearing that she was prepared to stand back and let Tate move on without disrupting that wasn't... particularly easy.

But there was little he could actually do about it if her mind was made up.

"I'll figure it out. I don't want to go blurtin' it out just yet anyway; I want to enjoy my time with him without it ruined by the pack so... I'll take a day or two before figuring something out with Ro. But... I'll tell them, soon. I want Ronan here with me and Teddy; I gotta be brave an' tell everyone to make it happen, don't I? Just... give me a few days," he grinned as he rested his head back against the surface of the hut to peer up at the clouds above them, his arm inching back over her shoulders to hold her close into their embrace, taking more joy from it than she could ever know.

"...Teddy loves Tala, y'know. She was gushin' about 'aving a new cousin that she could go explorin' with. She loves Sasha's kid but he's just a baby so she finds him boring and whines about not being able to play with him so... Tala's easily her favourite person right now; a cousin she can play with is all she's wanted," he continued with an amused smirk pulling at his features, peering across at Luana in the hopes the focus on their daughters would ease whatever tension remained within her.

"It's hard to really... get my head around the fact that when you left, neither of us were really parents. I was just lookin' after Teddy, really, but... then I sorta became her guardian and her Papa and... then you turned up with Tala. A lot's changed in two years, ain't it? You've changed; look at 'ya. I didn't mention it before but you look fuckin' great, Lu."
 
A free hand raised to scrunch of strands of her short-cut hair at his compliment of looking good. It had changed from its long length of just past her shoulders to a bob just around her jawline. The length had annoyed her during her time training, and was a bit of a liability at times when practice fights turned dirty. The shorter strands meant it wasn't as easy to grab hold of. Not to mention, Luana hoped it would symbolise a new chapter in her life, where she wouldn't be a weakness in her pack anymore.

"I did a lot of trainin'." She murmured, taking her hand away from her hair, "I didn't want to be a liability to all of you, y'know? It was bad enough I'd missed all those years of not being who I was. S'what I meant, when I said I was trying to become the alpha you all deserve." She smiled a little at the memory of all those training sessions, "It hurt like fuck but... but the idea of being able to help protect you all, of finally bein' good enough... it was enough to get me through it, y'know?"

Luana glanced up to him, removing her head from his shoulder but remaining in close proximity. She didn't dare move, not wanting his arm to fall away from her and therefore lose that sense of comfort and safety already.

"You're lookin' great too. Lost some of your puppy fat." She teased, smile melting into a stronger grin as she reached up to playfully pinch his cheek, "'Ave you been trainin' too or issit just all that runnin' around after Teddy? I... I ain't had a chance to meet her yet, but from what you've been sayin', she sounds like a bundle of energy."

She chuckled a little, averting her gaze and lowering her hand, pulling the sleeves back down to ensure her arms were covered, "I think we're gonna end up in a whole world of trouble, lettin' them two run around together. S'goin' be chaos. But at least we have us three, right? Me, you and Ronan? 'Cause... cause you're goin' to have to come visit me-- back at my pack I mean. I-- I've already invited Dase and Sash. Have a few days there together." She rubbed the top of her knees as she spoke, thinking about it briefly.

It was hard to think about leaving again, now that some of her closest had come around to relative forgiveness. But Lu knew that she couldn't become complacent. Just because Daisy, Anders and Sasha (plus Gio to some degree) had all forgiven her... that didn't mean anyone else would have. Not to mention, Tate had made it plenty clear she was only to stay for a few days.

Not wanting to dwell on leaving again when she still had a few days with the family that did love her, she cleared her throat to dislodge the lump that had formed again to force a smile and look back to Anders, "If... if you want me there... when you tell all of 'em..." She began, hesitant, "I'd be there for you, y'know that right? I just-- I just wouldn't want my presence makin' it worse for you, that's all. But honestly, Anders, if you want me there... I'll be there."
 
"You were always good enough, Lu. You might not 'ave been brought up in this environment an' so, sure, you probably had to work to get accustomed to shifting an' all that, but you... weren't a detriment or anythin'. You-- were a good alpha; a great one," he promised, having to stop himself from speaking in the present tense. As far as he was concerned, he would almost always recognise Luana as his alpha, someone who he acknowledged as a figure of authority and leadership.

But that wasn't technically the case when it came to this pack anymore. Their trust in her had diminished and their recognition of her in any role of leadership was simply not present - and though she was Tate's mate, a bond that couldn't be destroyed or removed, it seemed to be a fact that was overlooked and all but ignored.

She was the alpha's mate and therefore the alpha of the pack in her own right; Leah could never fulfil that role when she wasn't fated to be at Tate's side but the facts weren't acknowledged by a pack who wanted her out of their lives; not involved in it, and certainly not taking a role of leadership over them when she had abandoned that position for two years straight.

In most of their minds, she had no right to uphold such a position and so refused to recognise her right to it.

"But I ain't gonna pretend you look great, 'cos you do. You look tougher, like you could break my arm if you wanted. I'm gonna have to stay on the right side of 'ya," he smirked as he absently took in the shorter hair and the leaner physique, genuinely proud of how far she had come and her reasons behind doing so. It was ultimately rather sad that the efforts had been for a pack that now wanted nothing to do for her, but that didn't mean she ought to regret the effort - she was tougher and more capable now, and if the pack didn't want to benefit from that, then at least Tala would; she would have a mother who was in a better position to protect her child and that could hardly be of any regret.

He snorted under his breath when his own improvements were mentioned, shrugging casually as if it wasn't noticeable or even that big of a deal when the opposites were true.

"I needed somethin' to take my mind off-- y'know, everythin'. So I got training with Gio an'... I dunno, I enjoyed it. The guy works out pretty fuckin' hard but I kept up with him, I... got to like the routine of it. Mind you, looking after Teddy's the biggest workout; the kid doesn't stop," he playfully remarked, nothing but love in his voice as he thought about just how much energy his daughter had and how often he had to run after her. Not that he would change her for the world; he loved her just as she was and wouldn't ask for any part of her to change.

He paused from gushing more about the girl when the offer was brought up, his frown dipping slightly in response. The invitation to be at his side during one of the most difficult moments of his life was something he wanted to accept immediately, but how could he willingly put her in that awkward position in front of a pack who hadn't tried to hide their hatred of her? He wanted to protect her from their ferocity; not throw her in front of it.

But he also knew he couldn't face them alone; he wanted Ronan at one side and his best friend on the other or going through with it didn't seem all that likely.

"I... I want that more than anythin', Lu. I just... it's a big ask, ain't it? Askin' you to face 'em with me. Look, I want you there but don't feel you gotta go through with it when it happens. If you back out at the last minute, I ain't gonna hold it against 'ya. But... yeah, I want you there if you're up for it. You're my best friend - you're literally the only person I fuckin' trusted with this so I want you there when I get my shit together and tell everyone. Couldn't really do it without you now, could I~?"
 
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