S
Sylvinar Cross
Guest
Original poster
It was Autumn now.. The leaves had all but been gone now.. The howling of the wind could be heard outside.. Darkness.. Darkness had engulfed me and my room.. I was utterly alone.. Alone in solitude and alone in the world.. Where had my life gone?.. My ambitions?.. My hopes and my dreams?.. They were all gone.. Just like the leaves from the barren trees outside my window.. No sound could be heard.. aside from the howling of the wind outside my window.. I decided it was time to go.. I got up and got dressed.. it was time to leave.. to disappear.. I was all alone.. I had all but chased everyone who ever loved me away.. and everyone I had ever loved.. It was time to end it.. to end everything.. My existence.. My misery.. even my future in which had never existed in the first place.. I headed out to the train station.. The streets were all barren and silent.. no one was around.. I was the only one left.. the only one.. All alone in such a dilapidated world.. a world which had no future.. a world in which held no hope.. I stood on the platform.. waiting.. just wanting the time to go by already.. waiting for the train.. the empty barren lifeless train to come by.. so I could end it.. end everything.. What reason did I have to live?.. I had no one.. No one and no future.. No money.. No life.. Who would miss me?.. I had nothing.. Nothing to live for.. No one to live for.. 3:57 AM.. I can hear the screeching of the train coming toward me.. I step one foot forward as I hear it getting closer and closer.. suddenly I hear a scream.. "Don't do it! It's not worth it! Don't kill yourself! Please I'm begging you!" 3:58 AM.. I turn around to see a woman standing behind me.. Long blonde hair.. sky blue eyes.. the wind nipping at our cheeks.. It was such a fateful night I met her.. Who was this woman?.. Why had she stopped me?.. What reason did she have to stop me for?.. She didn't know me.. My eyes were becoming blurry.. I looked down to notice.. I had tears coming from my eyes.. Was I crying?.. Why was I crying?.. I had no reason to be crying.. Was I afraid?.. Afraid of death?.. Afraid of being all alone?.. It was then I realized.. I was crying because I had found salvation.. This woman.. This woman.. She.. She had saved me from ending everything.. from ending my future.. She took me back to her apartment.. It was there that I had showered.. She fed me.. gave me somewhere warm to sleep.. Somewhere I felt safe..
Somewhere.. Somewhere I felt that I belonged.. She had given me a new lease on life..
A few weeks went by.. we continued to live together.. things were looking up.. they didn't seem so bleak anymore.. I had someone in my life again.. I had a reason to live.. we eventually started to go out on dates together.. growing closer and closer together.. in those cold Autumn days.. We eventually decided to get married.. And so we did.. I was happy.. Content with my life now.. everything had but returned.. the ones I loved.. They were in my life once more.. I had gotten a job.. I was making money.. I had a beautiful future ahead of me with the most beautiful woman I had ever met.. with the woman who was my savior that fateful night.. that cold.. cold Autumn night.. the Autumn night in which I had planned to end everything.. We had a child.. a beautiful little daughter.. she had my eyes.. her mothers beautiful smile.. we were content.. we had a family of our own.. we still were in love just like we were when we first began to get serious.. the love never dampening.. only growing stronger with each passing day.. Our lives started to revolve around our beautiful daughter.. she had began to grow up before our very eyes.. she was still young and innocent but she was starting to grow up..
It wasn't until her first birthday that we had found out.. My beautiful wife.. my beautiful savior.. the woman who gave me reason to live again.. the one who saved me that fateful Autumn night.. she was dying.. she was dying and there was nothing I could do about it.. She had told me.. that she had cancer.. My beautiful wife.. In whom I had a child with.. a beautiful healthy baby daughter who just turned one.. had cancer.. she was dying from cancer.. and their was nothing we could do about it.. she went through chemo.. it didn't seem to be helping any.. the pain she went through was unbearable.. I couldn't stand to see her that way.. she had saved my life.. and I could do nothing but watch as she suffered far worse then what I would have.. suffer far worse than what I had.. My daughter had come up to me then.. she was even older now.. she had just turned four.. she asked me.. "Papa?.. Is Mommy ok?.. Is she sick?.. Will you make Mommy better?.." It was then.. my eyes began to become blurry once more.. I was crying again.. but it wasn't out of joy.. no.. it wasn't out of joy this time.. I then realized.. I was powerless.. What little hope I had in humanity was a joke.. I had suffered just to be happy.. in which that happiness was being taken away from me once again.. The doctor called for me.. I rushed to my wife.. It was winter now.. I had tears in my eyes still.. I could barely see her sweet face.. my beautiful wife had taken me by the hand and started to comfort me.. she had told me.. "Do not cry.. You have given me the most happiest life I could have ever want.. these past years.. They were what made me the happiest.. I was once like you.. filled with pain.. but then I met you that same fateful night.. I was going to end it.. and realized.. I didn't wish to die.. I wanted to live and be happy.." These were the words she spoke to me.. It was then I realized.. we were one in the same.. the two of us had been there that fateful night to end our lives.. but instead.. we found one together..
That was then.. my wife passed away from cancer.. I cried for days on end.. my world had come crumbling down.. my daughter came up to me once more.. it was almost christmas now.. she sat on my lap and embraced me resting her head on my shoulder and spoke to me.. "Papa?.. Is Mommy in a better place now?.." I replied to her.. my tears all but gone.. unable to cry anymore.. since they were all dried up.. my tears all used up.. "Yes.. your mother.. She is in a better place now.. Mommy can't come see us anymore.. but someday.. someday we will reunite with her.. and we will be a happy family again.." I sat there silently my mind gone blank.. It was then I decided to live for my daughter.. I went back to work.. I continued to pay the rent again.. I was in debt since I had not worked for quite some time after my wife's death.. but I was getting by.. Christmas Eve had finally come around.. I was as busy as ever at work.. hardly any time to go home to see my daughter.. she decided to come pay me a visit at work.. she was only five now.. the wind was cold.. nipping at her rosey cheeks.. I had gotten a call.. They had told me my daughter was on the way to come visit me at the station.. we were packed full.. but I left anyway in worries of her.. I found her and took her home.. Christmas day had come around.. she was running a high fever.. I tried to drive her to the hospital.. but the car was broken down.. I tried calling someone.. no one would answer.. It was then I dressed her up and rushed out of the house without even thinking so much as to put a jacket on myself.. I was running down the street in the snow blanketed road.. no one around.. no cars.. only the howling of the cold wintery air nipping at us.. Her condition was worsening.. we were still five minutes from the hospital by foot.. I slipped and fell.. I had sprained my ankle.. but I didn't care.. I had already lost one person.. I didn't want to lose my daughter as well.. I continued to run on my sprained ankle.. it hurt.. the pain was unbearable it brought me to tears.. I had finally gotten to the hospital and they had taken her in.. was I on time?.. Would my daughter be alright?.. A few minutes later.. the Doctor came back out.. he had informed me.. they did everything they could.. but.. she was gone.. my little baby girl.. was gone.. she.. she had died.. she had been suffering through pneumonia all night long while I was at work.. trying to make money to pay for the bills and buy her a Christmas present.. they had told me.. that her lungs filled up with fluid and she had drowned from her own fluids.. My world.. once again came crashing down.. I was all alone again.. with no one to love.. and no one to love me back anymore.. I went in to see her.. one last time.. she looked so very much like her mother.. It was then that I had pulled out a little small box from my pocket.. I had forgotten I left it in my pocket when I went to sleep last night and when the incident had happened this morning.. I opened it up.. it was a small music box with an angel inside.. the tune that was playing was From This Moment On...
Somewhere.. Somewhere I felt that I belonged.. She had given me a new lease on life..
A few weeks went by.. we continued to live together.. things were looking up.. they didn't seem so bleak anymore.. I had someone in my life again.. I had a reason to live.. we eventually started to go out on dates together.. growing closer and closer together.. in those cold Autumn days.. We eventually decided to get married.. And so we did.. I was happy.. Content with my life now.. everything had but returned.. the ones I loved.. They were in my life once more.. I had gotten a job.. I was making money.. I had a beautiful future ahead of me with the most beautiful woman I had ever met.. with the woman who was my savior that fateful night.. that cold.. cold Autumn night.. the Autumn night in which I had planned to end everything.. We had a child.. a beautiful little daughter.. she had my eyes.. her mothers beautiful smile.. we were content.. we had a family of our own.. we still were in love just like we were when we first began to get serious.. the love never dampening.. only growing stronger with each passing day.. Our lives started to revolve around our beautiful daughter.. she had began to grow up before our very eyes.. she was still young and innocent but she was starting to grow up..
It wasn't until her first birthday that we had found out.. My beautiful wife.. my beautiful savior.. the woman who gave me reason to live again.. the one who saved me that fateful Autumn night.. she was dying.. she was dying and there was nothing I could do about it.. She had told me.. that she had cancer.. My beautiful wife.. In whom I had a child with.. a beautiful healthy baby daughter who just turned one.. had cancer.. she was dying from cancer.. and their was nothing we could do about it.. she went through chemo.. it didn't seem to be helping any.. the pain she went through was unbearable.. I couldn't stand to see her that way.. she had saved my life.. and I could do nothing but watch as she suffered far worse then what I would have.. suffer far worse than what I had.. My daughter had come up to me then.. she was even older now.. she had just turned four.. she asked me.. "Papa?.. Is Mommy ok?.. Is she sick?.. Will you make Mommy better?.." It was then.. my eyes began to become blurry once more.. I was crying again.. but it wasn't out of joy.. no.. it wasn't out of joy this time.. I then realized.. I was powerless.. What little hope I had in humanity was a joke.. I had suffered just to be happy.. in which that happiness was being taken away from me once again.. The doctor called for me.. I rushed to my wife.. It was winter now.. I had tears in my eyes still.. I could barely see her sweet face.. my beautiful wife had taken me by the hand and started to comfort me.. she had told me.. "Do not cry.. You have given me the most happiest life I could have ever want.. these past years.. They were what made me the happiest.. I was once like you.. filled with pain.. but then I met you that same fateful night.. I was going to end it.. and realized.. I didn't wish to die.. I wanted to live and be happy.." These were the words she spoke to me.. It was then I realized.. we were one in the same.. the two of us had been there that fateful night to end our lives.. but instead.. we found one together..
That was then.. my wife passed away from cancer.. I cried for days on end.. my world had come crumbling down.. my daughter came up to me once more.. it was almost christmas now.. she sat on my lap and embraced me resting her head on my shoulder and spoke to me.. "Papa?.. Is Mommy in a better place now?.." I replied to her.. my tears all but gone.. unable to cry anymore.. since they were all dried up.. my tears all used up.. "Yes.. your mother.. She is in a better place now.. Mommy can't come see us anymore.. but someday.. someday we will reunite with her.. and we will be a happy family again.." I sat there silently my mind gone blank.. It was then I decided to live for my daughter.. I went back to work.. I continued to pay the rent again.. I was in debt since I had not worked for quite some time after my wife's death.. but I was getting by.. Christmas Eve had finally come around.. I was as busy as ever at work.. hardly any time to go home to see my daughter.. she decided to come pay me a visit at work.. she was only five now.. the wind was cold.. nipping at her rosey cheeks.. I had gotten a call.. They had told me my daughter was on the way to come visit me at the station.. we were packed full.. but I left anyway in worries of her.. I found her and took her home.. Christmas day had come around.. she was running a high fever.. I tried to drive her to the hospital.. but the car was broken down.. I tried calling someone.. no one would answer.. It was then I dressed her up and rushed out of the house without even thinking so much as to put a jacket on myself.. I was running down the street in the snow blanketed road.. no one around.. no cars.. only the howling of the cold wintery air nipping at us.. Her condition was worsening.. we were still five minutes from the hospital by foot.. I slipped and fell.. I had sprained my ankle.. but I didn't care.. I had already lost one person.. I didn't want to lose my daughter as well.. I continued to run on my sprained ankle.. it hurt.. the pain was unbearable it brought me to tears.. I had finally gotten to the hospital and they had taken her in.. was I on time?.. Would my daughter be alright?.. A few minutes later.. the Doctor came back out.. he had informed me.. they did everything they could.. but.. she was gone.. my little baby girl.. was gone.. she.. she had died.. she had been suffering through pneumonia all night long while I was at work.. trying to make money to pay for the bills and buy her a Christmas present.. they had told me.. that her lungs filled up with fluid and she had drowned from her own fluids.. My world.. once again came crashing down.. I was all alone again.. with no one to love.. and no one to love me back anymore.. I went in to see her.. one last time.. she looked so very much like her mother.. It was then that I had pulled out a little small box from my pocket.. I had forgotten I left it in my pocket when I went to sleep last night and when the incident had happened this morning.. I opened it up.. it was a small music box with an angel inside.. the tune that was playing was From This Moment On...
