POETRY A Cage of Demons -- Poems by Fluffy

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Fluffy

The Demon King ~ He/They
Original poster
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It varies. I can't promise much consistency due to my chaotic life.
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  1. Intermediate
  2. Adept
  3. Advanced
Preferred Character Gender
  1. Male
  2. Female
  3. Nonbinary
  4. Transgender
  5. Primarily Prefer Male
Genres
Horror, Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Superpowers, Drama. Also, romance is required with me because I will get bored without it.
A Cage of Demons
Poetry collection by Andi (aka Fluffy)​

NOTE: Most of my poems are of a dark nature. They have vibes that have been called "emo," "gothic," and "macabre." (However, I do have quite a few romantic ones up my sleeve, too.) Many are inspired by events of trauma, my mental illnesses, my DID/alter identities, and heartbreak. Even the 'happier' poems have a darkness to them. I have fascinations with monsters, death, demons, blood, and other horror-inspired things people may find unpleasant. Just wanted to offer some trigger warning there, just in case, as I do understand how that can be.




~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




You Are the Warlord

Make your move,
lift your sword
You wish to prove
you are the warlord

Steps so faint,
voice so low
Isn't it quaint,
this place that you know?

Reach in deep,
search your soul
Then, take the leap
straight towards your goal

Target locked,
swing like hell
A spirit shocked,
and a broken shell

Conquered beast,
rescued heart
Safely released
to make a fresh start

You are strong
This, I see
It's why this song
was written by me
 
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Cracks

Making cracks in my skin
as my demons begin
to surface from within

My mind will start to spin,
the craziness sets in

And I can't help but grin
while my wounds leak with sin
Oh, how foolish I've been,
believing I could win

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Feeble Doe

A sick insomniac,
with nowhere left to go
Just a timid maniac,
and her gun without ammo

I steered off track,
and I sank so low
This strength I lack,
I rue it so

You saw me crack
beneath my woe,
like a sneak attack
to a feeble doe

Keep to my back
so I won't know
as you paint me black
from head to toe,
and proceed to ransack
my mind 'till I'm hollow

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You Played Me

You made me,
but you played me
You'd dissuade me
when you'd degrade me
I wanted freedom, you forbade me
You stole, but never paid me
Don't try to persuade me,
we know you betrayed me

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Desolate Zone

A desolate zone
of dark graveyard tones
Where a mental cyclone
speaks in monotone

Upon a false throne
that's made of weak stone
Here, disaster is sown,
and failure is grown

Hopelessly alone
in blood that's my own
It puts chills in my bones
that I've always known
 
Echoes

One echo, two echoes, three echoes, four
I count them because they're hard to ignore
I count them 'till I just can't anymore

In my room of echoes, there is no door
They bounce between the ceiling and the floor,
as they intend to stay forevermore

Those sweet nothings I've never heard before
When they echo, they warm me to my core
In just a few words, we know I'm done for

The echoes will talk, the echoes will roar
A cry will echo when my heart is sore
They'll laugh, they'll jest, they'll seduce me, and more

At least I can say they're never a bore
In fact, these are echoes I quite adore

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So Wrong

You steered me wrong
with your pretty song
It had been so long
since I felt so strong
and like I might belong

But oh, I was wrong
They were lies all along

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ashes and Rain

All that remains
of the empire they sustained
is an abandoned domain
of ashes and rain

Just some old bloodstains
and a bunch of empty chains
are hiding in the domain
of ashes and rain

The power has waned
It may not be back again
This is a lifeless domain
of ashes and rain

A broken campaign
with the end of a great reign
They're buried in this dusty domain
of ashes and rain

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Are You Here to Stay?

When you're dead, you're dead for days
Days that turn to weeks, you know
Oh so quietly you'll lay
There, in your cloak of shadow

How you take my pain away
when your breaths make a rainbow
You sigh in a simple way
And then you let your smile show

In this fragile world of grey
remember you're not solo
Dead or alive, I will stay
Besides, I do need you so

All that I can do is pray
that I'll hear you speak, "Hello,
tell me, are you here to stay?
I don't want to see you go."
 
Nothing to See Here

Just shut your eyes, dear
Nothing to see here
No need to address
this beautiful mess
These wounds cannot heal
This heart cannot feel

Just keep your candle, dear
Nothing to warm here
You won't understand
these quakes in my hands
Or why it's still dark
despite your bright spark

Hold back your sobs, dear
Nothing to mourn here
This mind is far gone
So, you should move on
With your worried gaze
and generous praise

Just hold your breath, dear
Nothing to say here

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Least I Could Do (a poem for my son, who gives my life meaning)

"I can't take this anymore."
I've said it thousands of times before
But in my head, not in front of you
That's the least I could do

If life isn't too hot, it's too cold
The lack of patterns is getting old
But I'll be the warmth and shade for you
That's the least I could do

There's violence all around
with hardly a moment's peace to be found
But I take on the chaos for you
That's the least I could do

There will be a lot of fuss
on this long, harsh road ahead of us
But I'll make it all okay for you
That's the least I could do

I'm a shameful beast dressed in scars
Hope for me is exhaustingly far
But I try to be happy, just like you
That's the least I could do

You're a rare treasure I was lucky to get
Knowing that, I can't leave yet
I must keep fighting for you
That's the least I could do

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dreadful Carousel

You must feel pretty swell

Just chipping away at me,
right down to my cells

I close my eyes, count to three,
and pray to leave this hell

But no matter how hard I plea,
I'm trapped under your spell
I feel sick as can be,
riding on this dreadful carousel

Whether or not I'll be free,
it's far too early to tell
And as far as I can see,
this ride will not end well

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Caged Bird

This other part of me
She doesn't like to sleep
"Oh please, let me go free,"
she begs me as she weeps

This wish I cannot grant
I have the power, but
understand that I can't…
I can't no matter what

I have a wish as well,
which only goes unheard
A wish that I could quell
myself of this caged bird

The bird is lovely, yes,
but I'm so tired of her
There's no more peace unless
things go back as they were

Turn the dreams into dust
And paint the sunset black
Do whatever you must
to bring the silence back

It hurts to hear her sing
for someone who's not here
Put an end to this thing
Put an end to her tears

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Soundless Cry For Help

I want to cut out this piece of me,
at the risk of sounding too remiss
Oh, but it cannot be that easy
to replace that pain with emptiness

I never guessed days and nights would be
full of this confusing loneliness
Those times, I feel like a nobody
who just wanders their self-made abyss

It turns me blind, eventually
as I travel in the dark like this
An angel will show up, hopefully
to cure my agony with a kiss

All I can do is press on, and plea
that I may be granted such a bliss
 
Close

You're missed, you should know
You're with me, in my head, wherever I should flow
Through rain, sun and snow
Through my todays, yesterdays, and tomorrows

Close as can be since long ago
"Close" is a word that now brings sorrow
No longer does the love grow,
No longer does your smile show

I'd do anything for a "hello"
I'd probably kill just for a photo
You don't have to, though
You were always going to say "no"

Wishing you could hear my woe
Wishing you didn't leave me solo
Despite all things, I still need you so
Despite you abandoning me in shadow

While you're not around, I weep like a willow
While you forget about me, I sing in grave tempos
I curse so many songs on the radio
I curse them due to the pain I undergo

Broken promises bleeding me slow
Broken heart drumming in my torso
I don't think I can let go
I do, however, excuse what things you owe

May your future brightly glow
May you find treasure at the rainbow
Make memories colored from red to indigo
Make memories that, someday, I hope you'll let me borrow

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Call in the Night

The dark of night
I called for you
You answered fast
like you always do

We talked a bit
Just you and me
Some topics light,
others weighty

For a moment
the world felt right
I felt blinded
by your warm light

But lights all fade
We know this truth
Such was proven
back in my youth

Doom upon me
It mattered not
Talking like this,
it meant a lot

I was happy
You were crying
And you pleaded,
"Don't stop trying"

This dream was sweet
despite its end
I felt so blessed
to know you, friend

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I Miss You, Dear

The words made me think of you, dear
Words from this melancholic song
I keep on wishing you were here
and wondering where we went wrong

I can never forget you, dear
No matter how hard I may try
As memories of you draw near
I, without fail, begin to cry

I miss your voice most of all, dear
You just always knew what to say
I liked to think you were sincere
when you told me I'd be "okay"

Our friendship wasn't perfect, dear
But it's a friendship I'm yearning
"Nothing lasts forever," I hear
A lesson I am still learning

~~~~~~~~~~

Zoned

Stillness and ire
surrounding like fire
Stings cover my skin
like wraps of barbed wire

Slowing down my heart
so to tear it apart
It's hard to fight back
So, this might as well start

A torturous bane,
craving pleasure and pain
Electric passion
getting weak in my veins

Alone, getting high
Releasing smoky sighs
again and again
'till I'm too zoned to cry

Wishing you were here
to kiss away my fear
To fill me with life
'till shadow turns to cheer

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Harbinger

Silence on my shoulders
Full of sorrow and weight
The nights, they just get colder
Cold enough to freeze my heartrate

Becoming what I feared
It's not scary but oh, it's sad
I must have disappeared
The last time I got "bad"

The nightmare in my eyelids
Was me all along
For all the fighting I did
It turns out I wasn't strong

Lifeless amongst living
A corpse without their tomb
In this world so unforgiving
I'll be a harbinger of gloom
 
I Lost My Rhythm

I ask myself "Why?"
Why did I let my hopes get so high
High like my mind so troubled
Troubled thoughts make the drugs double
Double the smoke and monthly prescriptions
Prescriptions to numb my emotional confliction
Confliction that never really goes away
Away from sight, maybe, but not from mind
Mind the changes in my patterns
Patterns of quiet self-destruction
Destruction hidden beneath a somber rhythm
Rhythm that no longer smiles or rhymes

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Unlovable

Fire in my lungs
Desire on my tongue
Violent itch on my skin
Mind clouding with sin
Bones full of hurt
Scars under my shirt
Nightmares in my brain
Daydreams bringing pain
Red salty eyes
Lips painted with lies
Soul numbing
Heart drumming

Trying to survive
being dead while alive

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Same As Before

Falling apart
Again and some more
The threads, they snap
As they've done before

Stitching fresh wounds
From inner horrors
Breaking the flesh
'Till flesh is no more

Pieces of skin
Scarred, bloody and sore
Sew them back up
The same as before

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mirror

You look into the mirror
to see your face is smooth and clear
There's a rare beauty in your smile
and you have a cute hairstyle
Or, so you think,
as your gaze drops to the sink

You've never been whole
'cause of the pieces they stole
Empty spaces filled with spite
that poisons your mind with all its might
Though the surface looks appealing,
you can't shake off the feeling
of those monsters deep inside,
dwelling in the parts of you that died

As your reflection meets your eyes,
you can't help but despise
that ugliness, vile and true,
staring right back at you

You're a charming presentation of lies,
wearing that lovable disguise
Full of serpents and worms
who all burrow and squirm
They make your flesh itch
and they make your brain glitch
All to make you tear yourself apart
'till you're a bloody work of art
The threads you use to sew your skin
are invisible but sadly thin

I know how you felt
about the cards you were dealt
There's not much we can do
to successfully "save" you
All you can do is fight, fight, fight,
While hoping life will turn out all right

You may hate what you see
But I am you, and you are me
This is how it will be
for all of eternity
 
The Thief

Dreamy mystery dressed in black
Born to sneak and geared to attack
With roguish charm beyond belief
Somehow, that's fitting for a thief

The times you are a cold machine
get masked by explosive smokescreens
A known backstabber, that's the truth
Bitter feelings with words uncouth

Smirk exposed but orbits hidden
Views of your soul are forbidden
I can only imagine them
Storming with hate, pain, grief, mayhem

Our connection is forever
The likes of which I can't sever
My inner darkness, it's your home
Where 'sanctuary' means 'syndrome'

Poison tipped needles numbing me
You don't like when I'm too happy
My melancholy brought you here
As did my traumas and my fears

I know it must come easily,
how you can manipulate me
At some point, I no longer cared
Because you've just always been there

"A tortured heart all of my own."
Hold me close so I'm not alone
"No one loves you like me, darling."
I've grown to like hearing these things

Darkened vibes turn the air frigid
Frosted bites turning bones rigid
Though I shiver, I do not freeze
Weather like this puts me at ease

So alone since the day you came,
but feeling wholeness all the same
That's why we fight but also kiss
For in this loathing, I found bliss

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Monster That I Am

Imprisoning myself

High up on the shelf

Shaded from the ones

Who warm me like the sun

For I'm a perfect waste

On those with sweet taste

No one should love this damn

Monster that I am
 
Alone Together

You will always be here
as a secret in my ear
Alluring as can be,
talking in my head constantly
Sweet reminders so cruel
of desires both hot and cool

Standing chest-to-chest,
our forms tightly pressed
Feeling light as a feather
with our fingers linked together
So swiftly our pulses run,
yet they’re beating as one
Alone together in the night,
we know nothing is more right

Soft tunes of yearning
born from passions burning
Drawing patterns, sighing names
Sharing love without shame
Ignoring the laws of time
in this fantasy so sublime

Observing your gentleness and charm
as your lips trace down my arm
You compliment my scars,
saying, “Such a strong person you are”
While you kiss me with thought
for all the battles I’ve fought
And that’s when I quietly say,
“You take the pain away”
You’re the drug that numbs my ache,
the one who holds me when I break

And for all that you do
I hope to cure you, too
Beside you I’d stay,
to kiss you all day
While you shiver from
what pleasures are to come

The infernos I breathe in
turn to chills on your skin
You earn this delight
when you touch me just right
A lovely thought it is,
just you and me, always feeling like this

Holding your face in my view
so I can always remember you
You’ll watch as I stare,
with my hand in your hair
Already wondering when
we can be happy like this again

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From Trust to Dust

“Learn to trust
Learn this, you must”
Over and over,
it’s been discussed
“Just give it time
and you’ll adjust”
Well-meant beliefs that
inevitably combust

In their shells, hopes decay
Lively colors fade to gray
Somehow, I must have lost my way
Stumbling into this world
where the locals ‘prey’
instead of ‘pray’

Frigid words all dressed in pity
The rage it caused, it wasn’t pretty
Probably wept enough to flood a city
While my empire once strong
turns ruinous and gritty

Promises broken like fragile bones
are buried beneath
a cheaply made tombstone
Just remains of what was
so carelessly thrown
into the malnourished dirts of
a graveyard lesser-known

“Learn to trust
Learn this you must”
Preached on and on
Despite my constant disgust
from trust after trust after trust
getting turned into dust

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Concrete Heart

When we happened to meet
I was hiding from you
The emotional retreats
are defensive things I do

I wander harmful streets
without the aid of shoes
There is hellish, fiery heat
from which I can’t be rescued
Yet, you kept being sweet
You said, “Let me help you.”
Soon, the ground under my feet
was carpeted, good as new

I had sensed no deceit
as our bond grew and grew
And then I lifted the sheet
that blocked your truths from my view

The rug beneath my feet,
you were quick to undo
You saw reason to mistreat
You saw reason to askew
The song in my heartbeat
must have unsettled you
You chose to be indiscreet
about my curse, and loose screws

The day of that defeat
I started to hate you
If only I could delete
All this pain you put me through

Strength in my heart repletes
Sadly, it hardened too
Filling my chest with concrete
Just seems much safer to do

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ever Known

Happiness--true happiness
Now that is something
I've never known

Though unfortunate,
it's a fact in stone
Therapists treat joy as something
I have to be taught and shown
It always felt so pointless, but...
it's a routine well-known

I confess, I'm fading
I hide behind my alters more,
I've also hardened as I've grown
Too often, I've fallen apart, and
too often, I've been resewn
Broken pieces is all I am
And the only 'me' I've known

As far as I'm concerned
I'll always be alone
Even in a room of family
it's just
the life I've always known​

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Doctor, Dear

I can’t be fixed
But I can be treated
Doctor, I’m afraid
My meds have depleted
It seems incurable,
This numbness of mine
I’m a cold, burned-out star
Who got robbed of their shine
So, it hurts, but it hurts so good
Whenever I actually feel
It’s an addictive rush of joy
To realize it’s something real

Please, doctor, prescribe me
Several doses more
Of these remedial sensations
That I’ve never felt before
Give me happiness
Instead of a happy pill
Something to aid me
When I’ve fallen ill
No one has to know
Our secret, doctor dear
No one has to know
About our arrangement here

If I list off my symptoms
Will you be gentle with me?
Can you promise, Doctor,
You’re as trusting as can be?
If so, I’ll make a promise, too
I’ll promise to be
A good patient to you
 
The Gloom King

Lifeless amongst the living
A corpse without his tomb
In this world so unforgiving,
he is our harbinger of gloom

His nights, they just get colder
Cold enough to freeze his heart rate
He carries silence on his shoulders
with a sinister, kingly gait

Poignant drops of snow
adorning skin as cold as they
He is an icy master of woe
who we protect and obey

Such a melancholic beauty
So ashen like a ghost
His teeth and eyes are beastly
And where his hate is seen the most

The nightmare in his eyelids,
it was him all along
In his own memories, he hid
thinking that’s where he must belong

His former self just disappeared
within a dark mind of sadness
And now he is revered
as a sovereign of madness

“There is always tomorrow.”
Is that not what others say?
And things like “Leave weeping to the willows”
or “Live to fight another day”

Significant words turned hollow,
ever since his soul died away
Now he's a darklord who we follow
Each and every somber day

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Demontine (A valentine poem for my husband I decided to post)

Blackened heart
Full of stitches
Morbid art
'Neath your kisses

Demon blood
In human veins
Love that floods
To drown the pain

Broken soul
Warmly embraced
Feeling whole
And sugar-laced

Caring hands
Hold onto mine
Hand-in-hand
With valentine
 
Prince of Dark Dreams

I hearken back to a dark prince
decorated in sepulchral hues
An enigmatic being of quiet rage
from the same darkness I've come to know
Wearing his gloom like a mantle,
it's breathtakingly mesmeric how,
to me, he represents a comforting shadow

What's more is his gaze of vehement ardor
Oh so amiable yet tenebrous,
like a pair of autumnal dreams
on All Hallows' Eve
Such unfairly alluring complements to
the untamed slyness in his smile
Showing the true nature of a princely spook
with his charm and playful trickery

Summoning words as warm as the sun,
he guides me to a brisk never-land
that blooms with pulchritudinous colors
Colors which blend into portraits of longing,
and divine constellations
Colors which paint a whole universe,
for me and me alone,
that I may call my treasured mystery

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My Shell

Bid me a farewell
as I return to my shell
Where, alone, I can dwell
in my personal Hell

Hidden in my shell,
with its broken doorbell
It also, honestly, smells
like a haunted motel

Evils casting spells,
tearing apart my cells
None can hear me yell
while I'm in my shell

Feeling less than well
'cause of how hard I fell
But I'm here in my shell,
so who can really tell?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

But Don't Worry

Your heart and mind impel
you to give a sweet farewell
And then your cozy citadel
will start sinking into hell
But don't worry;
you're doing well

Trekking through the jungle of vines
in this land of your design
And your magnificence declines
as your feet hug the fault line
But don't worry;
you're doing fine

The skies, they've been a somber grey
ever since that hurtful day
And you hate to go away
from this wonderland of decay
But don't worry;
you're doing okay

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Breath of Fresh Air

Flames of bright orange and red
dance wickedly upon
the civilization
in which I live and breathe

The angry streets are hot
against my unarmored
soles as I walk through
the storm of toxic ash

Still, I dream of showers
cooling the burns on my
skin while icy winds lent
sweet whispers to my ears,
each one devouring
the echoes of my pulse
as it steadily beats
scorch marks into my chest

Oh, how I yearned to take
in that cool, soothing air
The blackness in my lungs
would instead turn light blue;
like my lips as they kissed
to the pond of raindrops
collected in my hands

And within mere seconds
the rainfall clung to me,
splashing my face with tears
so that I wouldn't weep

'Twas a moment where I
would tremble not from fear
of the city's cruel flames,
but instead, a cold
and oh so comforting sigh
scented like petrichor
 
Twisted Twisters & Twisted Sisters

Twisted sister
Twisted by twisters
Twisters that twist her
Twist her, twist her...

Sister couldn’t resist her,
The inviting twisted twister
She chose to assist her,
She hugged and kissed her
The twisted twister
who twists her, twists her...

My twisted sister,
And her twisted mister
Becoming twisters
who are truth resistors
Truths twisted by the twisted twister...
Twist him, twist her…

Twisted is my sister
For so long, I've missed her...
 
Sometimes in group therapy sessions, we get assigned 'creative projects.' I used my fifteen minutes to write this poem, which actually was stupidly therapeutic. (And I may be a bit proud of myself for being able to throw this many rhymes together in that time, heh...)

Looking

Looking out,
looking in
Feeling doubt,
feeling thin

I cry about
how cold it's been
I'm so wornout
from pain and sin

It's bleak without
a light within
Darkness, it sprouts
up to my skin
Then it spreads out
From toes to chin

Looking out,
looking in
When I blackout
the monster wins
 
The 'Fine' Timeline

Traveling on a timeline
in this world of my design
in which my soul is intertwined

Hand-in-hand with these demons of mine
We ride or die, we wine and dine
And tell ourselves we'll be just fine
So long as we stay on this line
Right? Yes– We'll be just fine…

But there are curses in my bloodline
Maybe you heard of me through the grapevine
Maybe not– Which is fine
After all, I do my best to avoid the sunshine
'Cause I'm a creature of the nighttime
And I'm a brother to broken canines
And a mother to feral felines
I am all of those things, which is also fine…

Still, I can't help but complain and whine
When I'm walking on this line
looking for a sign
of when things might be better than 'fine'
I'm from a place where hope doesn't shine
A place where I'm the Demon King Divine
My requests to resign,
they all get declined
This is where I'm confined

Twenty-four hours, from nine to nine...

I convince myself "Yeah this is fine"

A sigh on my lips and a chill in my spine
I'm armored just like a porcupine
while I walk my timeline

And convince this kingdom of mine
"We're fine"
 
A Candle? In My Heart?

A candle in my heart?
Now that’s a nice thought
To think, from the start
that a candle was bought
Must have added it to the cart,
with the other things I got?
Like curses and dark arts,
And some monsters I caught…
Things decorated like sweethearts
but destruction's all they brought

The shelves at this mart
had love that I sought
But the love came from black hearts
that made me besot
on sweet, poison-tipped darts

That kind of love wrought
me until I fell apart
That kind of love taught
me to be cautious and smart

But still, I know I ought…
To light the candle in my heart..
I would be so distraught
if the candle didn't restart

----

"Describe a Perfect Day"

On my perfect day
It’s brisk and grey
Storm clouds come out to play
While I pass through the doorway
I let raindrops fall where they may
As I wander to the cafe’
These raindrops, I like to imagine they
Are washing away
All my pain and dismay
Maybe I’ll turn numb long enough to say,
“I actually feel okay”
And then punctuate that sweet cliche
With a coffee drink on Saturday
 
These Feelings

Oh, this feeling,
I wish I knew
the best of ways to
describe you

Lonely feelings,
colored black and blue
They’re sinking into
me by the few

Heavy feelings
dropping through
Torment ensues
in my eyes of two

Stabbing feelings,
they grow and grew
Like needles, they drew
grim and bloody tattoos

Painful feelings,
I’ve more than a few
And that is due
to
those who
wished to
hurt me like you

Oh, how could you?
I wish I knew
All I can do
is wish it wasn’t true

All these feelings
I suffer because of you
 
This is a weird thing I wrote but whatever. It at the same time perfectly expresses how I've felt all month while people psychologically evaluate me and have me keep opening up about the darkest things from my past that I really didn't want anyone to ever fucking know.

Dark, Dark Secrets

"The dark secret you shared, it has shaken me
I never imagined
how dark a secret could be"

"Oh," sighed he.
"I'm... I'm sorry."

"Don't be, don't be
Now, dig a bit deeper
Cut your mind deeply
Dig up some more secrets
to share with me"

"Okay," said he.
Then he hacked at his mind
like an axe to a tree
From which he unearthed
Miasma and treachery

"It hurts," said he.
"But what more...do you need from me?"

"Secrets and more secrets
Come up with another two or three"

"Ah. I see,"
then he chuckled unsettlingly.
"I most definitely
have at least three."

Uncaged monsters
roaming free
Dark, dark secrets
so tragic and grisly

"For sharing your darkest secrets with me,
you might, but only might, be rewarded,
for it's not a guarantee."
 
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Broken Rule

You are beautifully cruel
for making me break my rule
"No more attachments,"
that's what I said
Stay better guarded
'till I'm finally dead
This way no one can hurt me
The rule protects me, you see

I realized something, though
About that pain I'm fearing so
The greater fear I have
is of hurting you
As it is I don't deserve
all these nice things you do
Still… I’ll tell you what
I may not like it, but

If our attachment should sever
I know it would wound me
Forever and ever
 
Words Unspoken
I have so much to say
But no one wants to hear it
I feel like this every day
My head, I just want to clear it

~

Shatters and Cracks
Shatters and cracks
beneath a smooth surface

Putting on acts
that might be superfluous

While walking on train tracks,
hoping nothing will hit us

So how are we to relax?
To do so feels treasonous

These are the harsh facts,
there’s no more to discuss
 
Gevalia Flavored Memories

A cup of coffee
is not all you are
You are a cup of memories
and mental scars

The delicious aroma
brings excitement to my heart
But my soul's in a coma
In this, it wants no part

The drink is a tasty
old favorite by far
Yet, it settles bittersweetly
on my tongue, it's bizarre

I can taste the teenage sorrow,
and I hear the college lectures
I remember the crows
perched on fine architecture

Old thoughts flooding back to me
of kissing and guitars
A certain pair called 'we,'
holding hands beneath the stars

These rememberings don't hurt
as much as they used to
But I wish they didn't insert
themselves like they do

How simple things could be
for a person made of scars
But a cup of coffee
is not all you are
 
Today, You're Here

Oh, how I've missed you
The weather is so dry here
But today, you're here

Somber Bliss

Tears of somber bliss
land on my face, hands, and head
How I relish it

Sky Lions

I'm wondering why
the lions in the dark sky
want to roar and cry

Stormdrops

Windstorms and raindrops
embrace me coldly, sweetly
They are my brothers
 
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