Looking for players of the opposite gender

daemon_reaver

The World Maker
Original poster
LURKER MEMBER
FOLKLORE MEMBER
Invitation Status
Posting Speed
  1. Speed of Light
  2. Multiple posts per day
  3. 1-3 posts per day
  4. One post per day
  5. 1-3 posts per week
Online Availability
All over the place
Writing Levels
  1. Beginner
  2. Elementary
  3. Intermediate
  4. Adept
  5. Adaptable
Preferred Character Gender
  1. Male
  2. Female
  3. No Preferences
Genres
Fantasy,Modern fantasy, Scifi, Romance, most stuff
Okay, not so much a rant, but an expression of sheer confusion. This was the closest thing though. In my (many) hunts for partners in 1x1s, I have come across a rather curious phenomena. People asking exclusively for one gender or the other. Not for the character mind you, that understandable bit. No, it's the partner. Now then, why the bloody hell would the person on the other side of screen, usually not showing their face, matter? I could understand if one were doing IRL, or a service like Skype, things can get awkward depending on the RP. But this a site where one does not display face or voice. Instead text and some sort of Icon appear, and mostly of anime, art, or TV show characters. The only way you get to know is if someone is male or female is by looking at their profile, if they let that indicator display, or ask. Seriously, I don't get why They feel the need to only play with the opposite. Is it seriously that awkward, despite not seeing the other's face or hearing their voice, when crafting a story?
 
I think it's usually a level of comfort thing. Though I don't care what gender the person is on the other side of the screen, I have several friends (women) who are not comfortable roleplaying with men. Now, I'm not trying to imply they have a problem with male roleplayers or anything of the sort, but when they do sexual roleplays, they don't feel comfortable with people they think are male on the other side of the screen. To quote one friend in particular, roleplaying a sexual scene with a male makes it feel like she's cheating on her significant other.

Is it irrational? Rational? I don't know, I can't say. I think it comes down to what a person is comfortable with. It is my opinion that there is nothing wrong with being selective about who you roleplay with. ^-^ I'm certainly more open to roleplayers I consider close friends than those I'm not. Some people just take that selectivity to a bigger extreme. As a hobby, everyone wants to feel comfortable and confident with who they're working with.
 
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Second part, Yeah, changed to understandable, well as I see it anyway.
 
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It's a comfort thing. I know that many female role-players, especially queer female role-players have had negative experiences with male role-players whom have made them very uncomfortable, whether it be from crossing boundaries between fiction and reality or from fetishizing the material (lesbian/queer female romance). I understand then why they would be really wary of starting role-plays with male players after that.

I can only assume straight male role-players only wanting to role-play with female role-players is kind of a 'no homo' situation, but what do I know really haha. I am not a straight man.
 
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I can attest to understanding this kind of selectiveness being a comfort kind of thing. I've had negative experiences with male roleplayers, so I feel it's completely rational to be selective in asking for a specific gender from their partner. While I don't mind the gender of the partner myself, I can empathize and understand their reasoning for doing things a certain way. ^^
 
I've seen this, but it's primarily been on another site I used to play on—on that other site, it was a 'no homo' thing in almost every instance, because OOC/IC boundaries were fuzzy at best and nonexistent far too often for my tastes.

I can definitely see why people might respond to repeated bad experiences by starting a preference away from a certain player type, though.

Personally, I don't object to anyone based on their pants or gender. I've had good and bad experiences across the spectrum. In my experience, guys tend to be more frank and easier to talk to for me, and they're great at long-term planning. I've seen other women show more hype, and usually they're the ones tossing more emotion-based ideas. Downside of guys: they sometimes get crushes on me and are sometimes hard to read. Downside of girls: I feel like I'm annoying because I always felt like I wasn't part of that group, and then when I do feel comfortable, I get TMI. @u@;;

Just my (belated) two cents!
 
bringing this back from the dead​
I've always disliked this because for one, it's assuming that there are only two genders. I'm stuck with a much smaller percentage of possible partners because I don't fall under either female or male. Secondly, it suggests a higher level of interest in your partner that is vaguely creepy. I believe it's best to learn personal facts after chatting unless already stated in the member's profile.

I can completely understand women being uncomfortable roleplaying with men though.
I don't rp smut very often so I never even considered the "cheating" aspect. I tend to forget that people have significant others (hello fellow ace/aro peeps).
 
I never cared either way, but I will say that all of my roleplays I currently have are with male ooc people. I have a few, very few, women I roleplay with because they take forever to tag and usually find excuses or never want to start anything.

With men its mostly: discuss, show characters and start
With women its mostly: discuss, discuss, discuss, discuss....maybe.....start?

Most of my roleplays are fairly consistent at a few tags per week or more. My one female roleplays pal? 6 months per reply, plethora of excuses, constant apologizing for not tagging.

Just ugh.

I usually feel with women there tend to be more rules, more issues and less overall roleplay but the quality of play is usually higher and with higher post word per post.

Even when I am playing the male, it's like dragging out tags from girls :( idk. I am hesitant to roleplay against females because they dont tag, tag so slow I get bored or only want to play female. Granted, I have never had a successful roleplay where I have played as male unless I am NPCing them.