Which my rebuttal to that is that you really don't understand the efforts people like myself I go through.
I was diagnosed with Autism at the age of 3. Not high functioning Autism/Aspergers, but low functioning Autism. The traits I had as a result of Autism included but weren't limited to:
- Slowed Verbal Development
- Slowed Fine Motor Development
- Unable to do eye contact
- Unable to express emotions or feelings such as love or affection
- Unable to read others emotions or feelings
- An immensely high tolerance to pain (I could land my head on concrete, or chew exposed teeth nerves onto a hoodie sleeve and not feel a thing)
- A Compulsive need to stim (Flicking fingers in front of one's face, constant itching, blowing on myself (NOT in that way!), pounding my own chest etc.)
- Not being able to develop social skills or graces naturally
- Difficulty handling stress
etc.
But over the years I was able to get better (with the help of parents, teachers and therapists*), to by the time I was 15 I was deemed well enough to no longer need help or support. And in the 8 years since I've only had one person figure out I had it without me having to tell them, and that person was also Autistic.
So yes Clyde, I very much do understand the efforts one must go through.
*It should be noted the topic of something like therapy is rather complicated. But to get into the dirty details of that would be to derail this thread, so with that noted the important bit that pertains to this thread is this. It doesn't matter how good the therapy is if the child receiving the therapy has decided they don't want to make progress. If they've decided their Autism is something Impossible to beat, or that something is a non-issue because "It's Autism", the effectiveness drops significantly. Which only further shows to prove, if the individual is not willing to roll with the punches and work to better themselves, then they probably are not going to better themselves, and always be dependent on others, others who may have things happen to them, others who may grow impatient if the person they are trying to help has decided they were owed that help, instead of also trying to help themselves.
I don't just sit around and bitch about my situation. Even if it seems that way. I have an appointment next Monday with my mentor ship program.
I am waiting for a call back from Vocational Rehabilitation and if they don't call me back I call them back and say "What's going on"
Ever since I put applications up, I call back and get feedback.
Then I applaud and support you in your endeavours there.
I think your statement is dismissive to the effort people put forth. And I think it makes it sound like no one is doing anything to better their lives.
I'm not dismissing anyone's genuine effort to improve or better themselves. I'm simply saying people shouldn't be using their disability as a reason not to put effort forward, or to expect others to do so instead.
I think its much wise for a man to admit where he has limitations. And the area he needs to work on. Then try to do everything himself. It should be okay for someone to ask for help.
Yes, but limitations aren't stagnant. They can be changed and improved, not something we just decide can't be helped.
That was my mistake in my life. Thinking the same thing you did Gwazi. That I had to put the effort in myself. I refused help from other people because of the mentality that You and You Alone have to do the work.
Well my philosophy isn't to refuse help, it's to also help yourself.
And my philosophy has led me to the point that I no longer have to blame my Autism for anything wrong in my life, so I don't feel my approach is a mistake in the slightest.
I just disagree that saying "well, that's life" makes any of it right or ok.
I never said that it was right or ok. All I said was "That's life".
That is the reality of the world we live in, we can get up and preach all day how it should be different. But anyone who does that and then expects employers to damage their own business for them are still going to find themselves not being hired.
And as been debated earlier in the thread, how it 'should' be is subjective. Some people think business should be willing to damage their business, some people think that it's unfair to expect people to damage the security of both their job and their fellow employees on account of one individual.
And so when I say I cannot do something, I honestly cannot do something and that should be respected.
Ok, but if you cannot work the hours the might need you to work for them you shouldn't expect to get hired.
Autism isn't a mental health issue as much as the way my brain has developed. Its a neural development disorder which means it has physical, mental, and educational components to it as well.
Yup, all of which can be worked on.
And I encourage people to work with us, with what we have. Instead of against us.
Working with each other is a two way street.
If you want others to work with you so that you can work that job. then you also need to work with them so that hiring you instead of the other worker isn't going to damage their business, or leave them scrambling to fill in emergency hours.
What I find ironic, is that if I wasn't so articulate. Or I wasn't so "intelligent". And I came here unable to wipe my own ass, drooled on myself, had to wear an adult diaper. And spoke in slurred speech. Looking for a lack of the word "Retarded" no one would tell him to put more effort into working harder for what they want. No one would tell him he should surpass his limitations. When you have the mindset of a 5 year old child in a 30 or older or younger body, no one has such harsh critique on them as much.
Those with a lack of knowledge on Mental Disorders wouldn't expect them to improve.
But those functioning levels have also been proven to be able to improve, they certainly have the highest amount of difficulty, yes, but improvement can still happen. And once they've improve a little it, the difficulty lowers, and it becomes a bunch of Micro-improvements for a Macro-change in the long run. That being said, the older someone get's the harder it becomes because their brain becomes less suggestible to stimuli, information etc, but not even the people that you describe are ever left completely unable to change their situation.
I need to start working with what I have. Because mentally I am that drooling guy who cannot wipe my own verbal ass [not my physical one]
*List of difficulties*
So now that you've got a list of things to work on, hopefully you can start working on those. And bring them to whatever therapists you see to work on with them as well.
It's the job of the community as a whole. To take care of its own.
In an idealistic sense, but not everyone shares the same values or ideals. And even someone who does share this ideal might be put in a situation of "Fire the person who can't cover us when we need to be covered, or the business caves". And in that situation, either just the person with a disability suffers, or everyone suffers (including all the other employees families). And ideals don't really help once you've been backed into making a decision like that.
From a practical sense though? People's job's are what they get hired and paid to do, and it was largely these people who came to this thread and stated they would not hire the person with a disability because it would be a less than optimal decision for them as a business.
Also, who count's as "It's own"? Because people here have also already expressed concern that although hiring the person with the disability may help the one with the disability, it can very easily hurt many more people. So if "It's own" is strictly those with a Disability, then hiring those with a disability may accomplish that. But if it means any human being, then arguably you may be having the reverse effect, even if it feels like the right thing to be doing.
